This week was a tough one with the little one being sick. And I was sick too. There were some undereating days (believe it or not the stress does get the best of me in that way) and some overeating days. So...my hope was that maybe it would all even out and the scale wouldnt be mean. Wrong. Today, 164.2. Thats up 2 lbs in one week. But, I am working at getting it back down there. I am not sure I deserved 2 whole pounds but whatever. There has been a lack of exercising and so many things have been out of the norm.
I am feeling better although I think this cold is going to hang on a while. But I need to pick the exercise back up. And I need to come up with a plan. We get together with the inlaws all the time. And it is a great time. I love to have company. But something comes over me and I lose control of my eating. They bring so many treats that are extremely hard for me to pass up. And the treats arent going to stop. I accept that. But I need to get a better handle on my self conrol not to eat them! Any ideas? I even ate before they got here so I could eat *my food*. Yeah...and then I ate theirs too... What the heck?
Today's reason for losing weight:
*I have used this reason before but it is weighing on my mind a lot lately so I will say it again. I want to see the 150's!!!!
Today I am thankful for:
*reading other blogs where people set goals for themselves. They have inspired me. I havent really set any specific short term goals to challenge myself to make progress. So, I think it is time. I think I will write about it in my post tomorrow after I pick the winner for the giveaway(deadline is tomorrow at noon EST)!
Happy Halloween.
Jennifer
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Friday, October 29, 2010
This week... (Jennifer)
Thanks to all of you who have entered for the giveaway from CSN stores so far. If you havent entered yet you can enter here. Good luck!
I havent posted much this week. My daughter has been sick and the docs where trying to figure out what was going on. It was a long and stressful week. It involved several trips back and forth to the dr and also for other tests. The diagnosis suspected and confirmed today: pneumonia. My poor baby. She is almost 4 and has only been on antibiotics once before this. And they said that is probably why they worked so well and fast this time. Needless to say, it was a stressful week. I was concerned, the drs were concerned, and it was scary. Thanks to all of you for your thoughts and prayers.
On another note...I was sick too this week. I had an awful cold. An old fashioned nasty cold. I didnt really give into it though because it was much more important to focus on my daughter and get her better. For most of the week I didnt have a problem with my eating. I couldnt taste or smell, and the stress made me actually need to force myself to eat. But then....my inlaws came to town yesterday, my daughter started feeling better and I let go a bit. I have said before that when my inlaws come there are so many temptations. I need to learn to take control of my actions when this happens. And for this reason, I am going to avoid the scale tomorrow even though it is weigh day. There was no exercise this week and I am still not up for it. My head was dizzy just walking around earlier from this stinkin cold. Running is probably not an option right now. But soon. I am back on track and I dont want to even see the damage I did or make myself feel even more awful about it. Even so though, it is very evident that I am a changed person.
Today's reason for losing weight:
*Sometimes it seems that some people respect an overweight person much less than they do a non -overweight person. Being on the overweight side of that equation for so long I dont think I respect a thin person any more than an overweight person. But I do remember feeling like maybe I wasnt respected at certain times. I have spent much time thinking about this wondering why this is. Maybe it is something I had created in my overweight head? Maybe just a lack of self esteem? I dont know. Either way I would much prefer to be respected than not. Does anyone have any thoughts on this? I would be curious to hear them...
Today I am thankful for:
*the doctors who took the time and had genuine concern to help my daughter this week. So many recheck visits and calls to check on her, running this test and that, and their excellent "bedside manner". Many of you know how my thoughts about the medical field have soured after some awful experiences in the last few years. So, having this positive experience, despite how scary and stressful it still was, was very important for me.
Have a great weekend!
I havent posted much this week. My daughter has been sick and the docs where trying to figure out what was going on. It was a long and stressful week. It involved several trips back and forth to the dr and also for other tests. The diagnosis suspected and confirmed today: pneumonia. My poor baby. She is almost 4 and has only been on antibiotics once before this. And they said that is probably why they worked so well and fast this time. Needless to say, it was a stressful week. I was concerned, the drs were concerned, and it was scary. Thanks to all of you for your thoughts and prayers.
On another note...I was sick too this week. I had an awful cold. An old fashioned nasty cold. I didnt really give into it though because it was much more important to focus on my daughter and get her better. For most of the week I didnt have a problem with my eating. I couldnt taste or smell, and the stress made me actually need to force myself to eat. But then....my inlaws came to town yesterday, my daughter started feeling better and I let go a bit. I have said before that when my inlaws come there are so many temptations. I need to learn to take control of my actions when this happens. And for this reason, I am going to avoid the scale tomorrow even though it is weigh day. There was no exercise this week and I am still not up for it. My head was dizzy just walking around earlier from this stinkin cold. Running is probably not an option right now. But soon. I am back on track and I dont want to even see the damage I did or make myself feel even more awful about it. Even so though, it is very evident that I am a changed person.
Today's reason for losing weight:
*Sometimes it seems that some people respect an overweight person much less than they do a non -overweight person. Being on the overweight side of that equation for so long I dont think I respect a thin person any more than an overweight person. But I do remember feeling like maybe I wasnt respected at certain times. I have spent much time thinking about this wondering why this is. Maybe it is something I had created in my overweight head? Maybe just a lack of self esteem? I dont know. Either way I would much prefer to be respected than not. Does anyone have any thoughts on this? I would be curious to hear them...
Today I am thankful for:
*the doctors who took the time and had genuine concern to help my daughter this week. So many recheck visits and calls to check on her, running this test and that, and their excellent "bedside manner". Many of you know how my thoughts about the medical field have soured after some awful experiences in the last few years. So, having this positive experience, despite how scary and stressful it still was, was very important for me.
Have a great weekend!
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
MY FIRST GIVEAWAY!!!! (Jennifer)
I am so thrilled to offer my readers a giveaway with CSN. CSN is a network of over 200 online stores, selling everything from dog beds(I bought an awesome one from there) to dining room chairs. My next purchse from them will most likely be a hanging light fixture for our foyer. I cant wait! Anyway....CSN is offering one of my awesome readers a $35.00 gift certificate to use on any of their shopping sites.
Stop by and check out their website: CSNstores.com
To enter, leave a comment in the comment section of this post telling me what you will use the gift card for. Be sure to include your email address so that I can contact you and let you know you've won.
This contest is open to residents of the USA and Canada. (Please note: extra International shipping fees MAY apply on Canadian orders.)
The contest ends on Monday, November 1, 2010 at 12:00 noon, EST. I will select the winner via random.org, and I will also post the winner on November 1st. So, be sure to stay tuned, and Good Luck!!!
Thats all from me today. My little girl isnt feeling well. The dr's are trying to figure out what is going on. I am just praying its a virus that disappears as fast as it showed up. Luckily I typed this up yesterday so it didnt take much time. Please keep her in your prayers. Thanks.
Stop by and check out their website: CSNstores.com
To enter, leave a comment in the comment section of this post telling me what you will use the gift card for. Be sure to include your email address so that I can contact you and let you know you've won.
This contest is open to residents of the USA and Canada. (Please note: extra International shipping fees MAY apply on Canadian orders.)
The contest ends on Monday, November 1, 2010 at 12:00 noon, EST. I will select the winner via random.org, and I will also post the winner on November 1st. So, be sure to stay tuned, and Good Luck!!!
Thats all from me today. My little girl isnt feeling well. The dr's are trying to figure out what is going on. I am just praying its a virus that disappears as fast as it showed up. Luckily I typed this up yesterday so it didnt take much time. Please keep her in your prayers. Thanks.
Monday, October 25, 2010
So close I can taste it... (Jennifer)
I have decided to wait until Saturday to weigh again. Once a week is good for me at this point. It keeps me motivated and less frustrated I guess. It makes a loss, any loss, seem so exciting when it has been a week since the last weigh in. If I follow my proper eating plan and keep up with exercise then any loss is appreciated at this point!
Having said that. The 150's are so close I can taste it. I want it. Dont get me wrong. I am thrilled with my overall weight loss on this journey. But most of the loss happened in the first half of this journey. The last 4 months things have stalled out. I have been talking about this for a while now. But I feel remotivated and excited about losing weight again. Today marks 8 months since I started blogging. I have changed in so many ways since then. I hear the longer you do something, the more committed you become and then it is more likely to become a habit. And that is what I want for myself. I want it to be a habit to eat properly and exercise regularly. Even when I get to my goal(I have hope this will happen someday!!!!) I still want to have the same habits. I like how I feel now compared to how I felt a year ago.
Today's reason for losing weight:
*I went from loving shopping back when I was 150 lbs to hating shopping 75 lbs later. I hated how I felt shopping for big girl clothes. It was a reminder that I was a failure in the weight department. Plus, being a stay at home mom we have one income and it really wasnt a possibility to shop at Lane Bryant where the prices seem so high. I remember being so frustrated. There arent as many options for big girl clothes out there. Now, having lost 65 of that 75 lbs I gained, I can shop just about anywhere and it is much easier to find great deals! I am such a bargain shopper.
Today I am thankful for:
*I got a shirt in the juniors dept the other day. It may have been an XL but hey, it was still in the jr's dept. I am 31 years old. I wish I hadnt missed out for so many years on wearing the younger stylish clothing that was out there. I am doing my best to make up for it now...age appropriate and within our budget of course :) Its amazing how putting on a piece of clothing that I love and fits so well can really make me feel good about myself. Certainly not cocky, but confident maybe. Does anyone agree with this???
Hope you all have a great day.
Jennifer
Having said that. The 150's are so close I can taste it. I want it. Dont get me wrong. I am thrilled with my overall weight loss on this journey. But most of the loss happened in the first half of this journey. The last 4 months things have stalled out. I have been talking about this for a while now. But I feel remotivated and excited about losing weight again. Today marks 8 months since I started blogging. I have changed in so many ways since then. I hear the longer you do something, the more committed you become and then it is more likely to become a habit. And that is what I want for myself. I want it to be a habit to eat properly and exercise regularly. Even when I get to my goal(I have hope this will happen someday!!!!) I still want to have the same habits. I like how I feel now compared to how I felt a year ago.
Today's reason for losing weight:
*I went from loving shopping back when I was 150 lbs to hating shopping 75 lbs later. I hated how I felt shopping for big girl clothes. It was a reminder that I was a failure in the weight department. Plus, being a stay at home mom we have one income and it really wasnt a possibility to shop at Lane Bryant where the prices seem so high. I remember being so frustrated. There arent as many options for big girl clothes out there. Now, having lost 65 of that 75 lbs I gained, I can shop just about anywhere and it is much easier to find great deals! I am such a bargain shopper.
Today I am thankful for:
*I got a shirt in the juniors dept the other day. It may have been an XL but hey, it was still in the jr's dept. I am 31 years old. I wish I hadnt missed out for so many years on wearing the younger stylish clothing that was out there. I am doing my best to make up for it now...age appropriate and within our budget of course :) Its amazing how putting on a piece of clothing that I love and fits so well can really make me feel good about myself. Certainly not cocky, but confident maybe. Does anyone agree with this???
Hope you all have a great day.
Jennifer
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Yesterday's Weigh In (Jennifer)
Yesterday's weigh in: 162.1. That is two lbs down since last week. This is a number I have seen several times over the last few months. Up and down, up and down. My real mini-ambition is to get below 161 which is the lowest I have seen on this journey, and then to see the 150's. But, I am happy with a two lb loss last week. I worked hard for it. And I know I only did great things for my body along the way regardless of the scale. I was focused in my eating, and I exercised regularly.
Having siad that, last night I had some "treats". Should I have had less of them? Yes, but it wasnt awful. I have been craving graham crackers. So I had some. And it wouldnt have been as bad had I not found the chocolate and marshmallows that were with them in the Smores bag from this summer. Oops. And this is exactly why I dont have this stuff in the house. Because in a week moment it all goes down. Although I have to say there are fewer weak moments than in the past. And, I really dont feel too bad about it. The sample menu/guide for eating that my gym provides allows for 6 days of eating a 1200 calorie diet and 1 day of letting loose and enjoying. Now, letting loose and enjoying for me is much different than it was in the past. A few graham crackers and smores is fine. It wasnt a whole day(or every single day like it used to be) of eating crappy food. This morning, for breakfast I had 1 cup of light yogurt with some frozen raspberries with a packet of granola from McDonalds. I save the packets when I get a fruit n yogurt parfait there. Again, a sign of the new Jen....getting yogurt at McDonalds! My breakfast today...about 150 calories and very filling.
Today's reason to lose weight:
*In the past when going to parties and such I was always self conscious about how much I was eating. I always compared what/how much I was eating to others to make sure I didnt get the "she is fat and shouldnt be eating that" look. Although I must say it didnt stop me from overeating I just found ways to eat unnoticed. Today we have a party to go to and I have no concerns about eating too much. I feel in control. I dont think people will scrutinize what is on my plate. I am hoping this will only get even better with time!!! Even on the days when I dont count calories because it is not food I prepared I feel I have a pretty good idea of how much is acceptable for my journey.
Today I am thankful for:
*being disappointed that my husband went back to bed this morning(which by the way he never ever does). Why am I thankful for this? Because the reason I am all bent out of shape is because I would like to go for a run before I have to shower and go to the party. What a great way to start the day off when I know there will be party food. But we have two little ones so I have to stay with them if he is sleeping. I am THANKFUL that I WANT to run!!! I should say... my hubs would certainly get up in a heartbeat if I asked him to. I didnt even tell him a run was in my thoughts so he had no idea. But since he rarely sleeps in I think he deserves it.
Having siad that, last night I had some "treats". Should I have had less of them? Yes, but it wasnt awful. I have been craving graham crackers. So I had some. And it wouldnt have been as bad had I not found the chocolate and marshmallows that were with them in the Smores bag from this summer. Oops. And this is exactly why I dont have this stuff in the house. Because in a week moment it all goes down. Although I have to say there are fewer weak moments than in the past. And, I really dont feel too bad about it. The sample menu/guide for eating that my gym provides allows for 6 days of eating a 1200 calorie diet and 1 day of letting loose and enjoying. Now, letting loose and enjoying for me is much different than it was in the past. A few graham crackers and smores is fine. It wasnt a whole day(or every single day like it used to be) of eating crappy food. This morning, for breakfast I had 1 cup of light yogurt with some frozen raspberries with a packet of granola from McDonalds. I save the packets when I get a fruit n yogurt parfait there. Again, a sign of the new Jen....getting yogurt at McDonalds! My breakfast today...about 150 calories and very filling.
Today's reason to lose weight:
*In the past when going to parties and such I was always self conscious about how much I was eating. I always compared what/how much I was eating to others to make sure I didnt get the "she is fat and shouldnt be eating that" look. Although I must say it didnt stop me from overeating I just found ways to eat unnoticed. Today we have a party to go to and I have no concerns about eating too much. I feel in control. I dont think people will scrutinize what is on my plate. I am hoping this will only get even better with time!!! Even on the days when I dont count calories because it is not food I prepared I feel I have a pretty good idea of how much is acceptable for my journey.
Today I am thankful for:
*being disappointed that my husband went back to bed this morning(which by the way he never ever does). Why am I thankful for this? Because the reason I am all bent out of shape is because I would like to go for a run before I have to shower and go to the party. What a great way to start the day off when I know there will be party food. But we have two little ones so I have to stay with them if he is sleeping. I am THANKFUL that I WANT to run!!! I should say... my hubs would certainly get up in a heartbeat if I asked him to. I didnt even tell him a run was in my thoughts so he had no idea. But since he rarely sleeps in I think he deserves it.
Friday, October 22, 2010
Tomorrow (Jennifer)
Tomorrow is weigh in day. I have changed a bunch of things up this week, including not weighing myself at all. I have always been a once a week weigher until a few months ago when I hit this plateau and decided maybe I need to hop on every day. But I decided not to get on at all since my last weigh in last Saturday when the scale showed 164. And I actually think it is better for me. I just went on with my business eating the way I felt I should and exercising without worrying what the scale said. And as far as the exercise went, less weighing seemed to be better for me. It made me drive harder. I felt like my efforts might make a difference. It is frustrating to exercise and then get on the scale the next day and see no change. Who wants to exercise when they feel it isnt make a difference? At least that is what the Old Jen would have thought. But if I exercise and not worry about the scale it makes me feel like I am making a difference. A mind game, maybe, but if it keeps me happy exercising then so be it!
Today: a 3.1 mile run before dinner. I was feeling tired and didnt want to. But with my new experiences that running actually make me feel better I did it. And it did. It cleared my head, energized me, and the chilly weather felt great to run in.
Today's reason for losing weight:
*to wear jeans and not worry about the roll hanging over(I believe we are calling this a "muffin top" these days? Very clever name :) And I must say that I have made huge improvements in this area. Part of it is wearing jeans that fit. In the past I would have done just about anything not to go up a size. I was probably a size 22 or 24 making myself fit into a 20. The other part is that the roll is getting smaller! That is one of my confidence things. I like to be able to grab my waist and actually feel that I have one!!!!!!
Today I am thankful for:
*there was a dog on my run who really seemed to want a piece of me. He came running full speed at me barking something fierce(as I continued to run). All I could think of was how the owner once told me when we were walking our dog that their dog liked other dogs better than people. He wouldnt let up and I thought a few times he was going to jump on me. I am an amimal lover and hoped for the best and just kept running. It seemed like he ran with me forever before he eventually stopped and continued barking from there. In reality it was probably a tenth of a mile...hehe. I am thankful I made it home with no teeth marks or blood :)
*yes, another thankful moment.... Today I was in the store and I walked past a mirror and I actually thought my legs looked skinny! Of course I had a puffy down vest on so maybe that is why...hehe. But hey, it made me feel good.
Jennifer
Today: a 3.1 mile run before dinner. I was feeling tired and didnt want to. But with my new experiences that running actually make me feel better I did it. And it did. It cleared my head, energized me, and the chilly weather felt great to run in.
Today's reason for losing weight:
*to wear jeans and not worry about the roll hanging over(I believe we are calling this a "muffin top" these days? Very clever name :) And I must say that I have made huge improvements in this area. Part of it is wearing jeans that fit. In the past I would have done just about anything not to go up a size. I was probably a size 22 or 24 making myself fit into a 20. The other part is that the roll is getting smaller! That is one of my confidence things. I like to be able to grab my waist and actually feel that I have one!!!!!!
Today I am thankful for:
*there was a dog on my run who really seemed to want a piece of me. He came running full speed at me barking something fierce(as I continued to run). All I could think of was how the owner once told me when we were walking our dog that their dog liked other dogs better than people. He wouldnt let up and I thought a few times he was going to jump on me. I am an amimal lover and hoped for the best and just kept running. It seemed like he ran with me forever before he eventually stopped and continued barking from there. In reality it was probably a tenth of a mile...hehe. I am thankful I made it home with no teeth marks or blood :)
*yes, another thankful moment.... Today I was in the store and I walked past a mirror and I actually thought my legs looked skinny! Of course I had a puffy down vest on so maybe that is why...hehe. But hey, it made me feel good.
Jennifer
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
A change (Jennifer)
I have been doing some research for the past few weeks on how to break a plateau. While my eating could be better, I think for themost part over the past 4 months my efforts deserve some droppage on the scale. So, I have picked up the exercise as one of the trainers told me to do. But my newest change: is to "zig zag" my calories. I am supposed to be eating between 1200-1400 calories a day to lose weight. So....I went back in my journal and saw how i was eating 1200, 1250, 1300 calories almost every day for a while there and no change on the scale. I read how I should change it up some...which goes right along with what the trainer said a few weeks back that I need to change something.
One day I will eat 1100 calories, the next 1600, the next 1500, 1200, etc...change it up a bit and see if that helps. Hopefully between my exercise changes and changing my eating habits I can see some movement.
One of my favorite bloggers(we seem to have a lot in common and she is always telling me we live "parallel lives") has hit an amazing milestone and accomplished a long awaited goal today. Dawne, over at "It's My Time" was at a similar plateau for what seemed like forever. She was patient, persistent, and never gave up and today her efforts paid off. She fought back and today, she has reached the 150's!!!!!!! I am so happy for you Dawne and you are such an inspiration to me and so many others! Your success has intensified my drive to be healthy too!!! Keep up the great work!!!!
Today's reason for losing weight:
*so that someday soon I too can write about how I have reached the 150's!!!!!! I cant wait!!!
Today I am thankful for:
*Blogland. I cannot even tell you just how much support and knowledge that writing my own blog, and reading other blogs, has given me.
One day I will eat 1100 calories, the next 1600, the next 1500, 1200, etc...change it up a bit and see if that helps. Hopefully between my exercise changes and changing my eating habits I can see some movement.
One of my favorite bloggers(we seem to have a lot in common and she is always telling me we live "parallel lives") has hit an amazing milestone and accomplished a long awaited goal today. Dawne, over at "It's My Time" was at a similar plateau for what seemed like forever. She was patient, persistent, and never gave up and today her efforts paid off. She fought back and today, she has reached the 150's!!!!!!! I am so happy for you Dawne and you are such an inspiration to me and so many others! Your success has intensified my drive to be healthy too!!! Keep up the great work!!!!
Today's reason for losing weight:
*so that someday soon I too can write about how I have reached the 150's!!!!!! I cant wait!!!
Today I am thankful for:
*Blogland. I cannot even tell you just how much support and knowledge that writing my own blog, and reading other blogs, has given me.
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Test.... (Jennifer)
The other day I blogged about how I had been cranky that day. I went on a run and came back a new refreshed me. Remember? I was surprised at so many comments agreeing with my new realization. I decided to put this amazing new found knowledge to the test. Could it really be an immediate bad mood buster???? Last night I hopped on the treadmill. I thought, its later in the night, I am not a huge fan of running on the treadmill in general (I prefer outdoor running anyday) and I was kinda tired. But, I knew I wanted to get the exercise in especially after having pizza for dinner. I didnt really have a set distance I wanted to run. I figured I would just see how things went. 3.1(5K) is what I ended up doing! I was sweaty, into my music, watching HGTV on mute, and having a ball. I was getting closer to the end of the 3 miles when I realized that I was very close to the time that I had done my first 5K race at: 33:33. I challenged myself. I really had to speed it up at the end, like 7mph(very briefly) or so but I did it. I made a new 5K time for me: 33:10. A few seconds isnt much, but its better!
Then today...the sun was shining and I thought it would be a great day for an outside run. I wanted to see if I could keep this strech of "good" runs going. We had things on the schedule but we worked it out and I managed a run. I did have some excuses not to in the back of my head ready to take over but I stomped them out. Soon it will be too cold and snowing and I wont be able to run outside. I should take advantage now. I planned on 2 miles since it would be my 3rd day running. Off I went. The first mile was the toughest part of the run but not nearly as tough as I have had in the past. In the beginning I was thinking about how my legs felt tired beneath me and maybe my body is asking for a rest. It made me thing of a previous post I did about my body asking for rest and then how it "thanked" me when I did. Anyway, the legs were tired but I knew I would complete the 2 miles. And as I was nearing the two mile mark I realized I felt GREAT! Not only werent my legs tired anymore and my breathing was pretty good, but I realized I still had more in me. I WANTED to do more. Wow. So I did. I ran what I thought was close to a half mile and then turned and when back. I traced my steps with the car later and realized I had done: 3.1! Another 5k! Boy, I really need to look into one of the Garmin GPS thingies.
So far so good. After all of my last 3 runs I have felt amazing!!!!!!!!
Also, I have decided to stay away from the scale for a week from when I weighed last, which was Saturday. I am finding it exciting waiting for the day to come with hopes my hard work this week pays off!
Today's reason for losing weight:
*Losing weight seems to be allowing me to experience new things. In the past I would have been a "watcher". I am now more of a "doer". It feels good not to watch life go by from the sidelines. I still have a ways to go with my confidence but so far I like the changes. It makes me a more active mother to my children too.
Today I am thankful for:
*Having found a form of exercise that I like. I never thought the day would come....ever! Running has changed my life.
Thanks for all your kinds words about our Sugar Marie. She is the best!
Then today...the sun was shining and I thought it would be a great day for an outside run. I wanted to see if I could keep this strech of "good" runs going. We had things on the schedule but we worked it out and I managed a run. I did have some excuses not to in the back of my head ready to take over but I stomped them out. Soon it will be too cold and snowing and I wont be able to run outside. I should take advantage now. I planned on 2 miles since it would be my 3rd day running. Off I went. The first mile was the toughest part of the run but not nearly as tough as I have had in the past. In the beginning I was thinking about how my legs felt tired beneath me and maybe my body is asking for a rest. It made me thing of a previous post I did about my body asking for rest and then how it "thanked" me when I did. Anyway, the legs were tired but I knew I would complete the 2 miles. And as I was nearing the two mile mark I realized I felt GREAT! Not only werent my legs tired anymore and my breathing was pretty good, but I realized I still had more in me. I WANTED to do more. Wow. So I did. I ran what I thought was close to a half mile and then turned and when back. I traced my steps with the car later and realized I had done: 3.1! Another 5k! Boy, I really need to look into one of the Garmin GPS thingies.
So far so good. After all of my last 3 runs I have felt amazing!!!!!!!!
Also, I have decided to stay away from the scale for a week from when I weighed last, which was Saturday. I am finding it exciting waiting for the day to come with hopes my hard work this week pays off!
Today's reason for losing weight:
*Losing weight seems to be allowing me to experience new things. In the past I would have been a "watcher". I am now more of a "doer". It feels good not to watch life go by from the sidelines. I still have a ways to go with my confidence but so far I like the changes. It makes me a more active mother to my children too.
Today I am thankful for:
*Having found a form of exercise that I like. I never thought the day would come....ever! Running has changed my life.
Thanks for all your kinds words about our Sugar Marie. She is the best!
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Sugar Marie (Jennifer)
The hubs had to work all weekend. We are trying to cut back on spending so I stayed in most of the weekend. I tracked my food pretty carefully but was really missing out on the treats I had all last week. And there were LOTS of treats last week. By today I was feeling a little sorry for myself. I was cranky. I was feeling a little couped up in the house, feeling deprived because I wasnt eating cookies, ice cream, and chocolate to make myself feel better. Then I went for a run this evening. I was dreading it to be honest. The last few I have had were on the treadmill at 6mph and I did only a mile and prayed every second I was doing it that it would end soon. hehe.
But...I geared up and off I went. I set out for 2 miles. I decided to be leisurely about it so I could attempt to enjoy it. For me, after a tough run it is hard to get myself back out there again. Which is odd because I am always swearing I love running. And this is why...I had a great run today and when I was done with my 2 miles I cannot even explain how *refreshed* I felt. I felt better mentally and physically. I got myself out of the house, had some me time, cleared my head, accomplished something with a sense of pride, helped myself physically by burning calories, felt energized, and...I enjoyed doing it throughout the whole thing(this is big for me because lots of times when I run the first mile is tough for me. But not today!!). Wow, a few minutes outside for a run and I came back a different person. Who knew? My mood was happier, lighter, and I realized it. It was another one of those realizations that just hit me while I was hanging out with the family being as happy as could be.
Soooo....apparently when I am cranky the first thing I should do is exercise??? A new thought for a girl who used to feed a bad mood (while sitting on the couch) until I felt better. I will have to mark this post because how many times do we just NOT feel like exercising for no good reason at all? No more excuses for me.
Today's reason for losing weight:
*smaller clothes = less laundry. The more clothes you can fit in one load the better, right?
Today I am thankful for:
*my dog, Sugar Marie(yes, she has a middle name). She always has such unconditional love to give. She is our dog we rescued almost one year ago. She has become a wonderful and special part of our family. She is so affectionate and appreciative of her life with us, and she lets us know just how happy she is everyday!
Napping in the car together.
The cat took her bed soooo...what is the best thing to do?
Retaliate. Take the cats bed :)
Yes, a tutu. One of the girls :)
But...I geared up and off I went. I set out for 2 miles. I decided to be leisurely about it so I could attempt to enjoy it. For me, after a tough run it is hard to get myself back out there again. Which is odd because I am always swearing I love running. And this is why...I had a great run today and when I was done with my 2 miles I cannot even explain how *refreshed* I felt. I felt better mentally and physically. I got myself out of the house, had some me time, cleared my head, accomplished something with a sense of pride, helped myself physically by burning calories, felt energized, and...I enjoyed doing it throughout the whole thing(this is big for me because lots of times when I run the first mile is tough for me. But not today!!). Wow, a few minutes outside for a run and I came back a different person. Who knew? My mood was happier, lighter, and I realized it. It was another one of those realizations that just hit me while I was hanging out with the family being as happy as could be.
Soooo....apparently when I am cranky the first thing I should do is exercise??? A new thought for a girl who used to feed a bad mood (while sitting on the couch) until I felt better. I will have to mark this post because how many times do we just NOT feel like exercising for no good reason at all? No more excuses for me.
Today's reason for losing weight:
*smaller clothes = less laundry. The more clothes you can fit in one load the better, right?
Today I am thankful for:
*my dog, Sugar Marie(yes, she has a middle name). She always has such unconditional love to give. She is our dog we rescued almost one year ago. She has become a wonderful and special part of our family. She is so affectionate and appreciative of her life with us, and she lets us know just how happy she is everyday!
Napping in the car together.
The cat took her bed soooo...what is the best thing to do?
Retaliate. Take the cats bed :)
Yes, a tutu. One of the girls :)
Saturday, October 16, 2010
A reminder (Jennifer)
Today has been a bitter sweet day in my journey to a better and happier me. I got on the scale this morning to see 164. Not bad for a week off out of conrol eating, I thought. And it was a rough week for sure. I seem to stick in he 161-166 range for the past 4+ months. So 164 was kind of a relief after poor choice after poor choice this last week.
Until.....I went to a Zumbathon at my daughters' dance studio this morning. It was a benefit for breast cancer. A great cause so I went. Its been a while since I did Zumba because of my ankle injury. It was a little sore here and there but I managed. Anyway...we did it in front of mirrors. These were once mirrors that showed me how how my progress was during my weight loss of 65ish lbs.
But today...it was a reminder of just how much room for improvement there is. I was the fat girl there. I saw the fat roll in the mirror. My shirt looked tight. My arms were big. And this was much more than my big girl mentality coming in. Although that was there too for sure. I felt insecure. Even embarassed...hmmmm. I know much of this is because of how I ate last week and havent been exercising the way I want to. The girls there were much thinner than me and I felt and looked so frumpy in the mirror. These are feelings I havent seen in a while.
But, again, I am pulling the positive out of this. For the last few months when the scale has been stuck, I was having some thought of "maybe this is what I am capable of. Maybe this is where my body is comfortable and I cant lose anymore". Today was a reminder that I can do much better and make much better choices.
Today's reason for losing weight:
*to be happy with what I see in the mirror. For a while I was almost there! And I want to get back to that point. Regardless of what the scale says I can tone up there is nothing negative that can come from that! Helping myself by eating well and exercising is the best thing I can do for my morale. Lesson learned. I will add that to the list.
Today I am thankful for:
*having this whole revelation that I CAN do better. I CAN make better choices. I am thankful for the attitude to fight back instead of give up.
Have a great weekend!
Until.....I went to a Zumbathon at my daughters' dance studio this morning. It was a benefit for breast cancer. A great cause so I went. Its been a while since I did Zumba because of my ankle injury. It was a little sore here and there but I managed. Anyway...we did it in front of mirrors. These were once mirrors that showed me how how my progress was during my weight loss of 65ish lbs.
But today...it was a reminder of just how much room for improvement there is. I was the fat girl there. I saw the fat roll in the mirror. My shirt looked tight. My arms were big. And this was much more than my big girl mentality coming in. Although that was there too for sure. I felt insecure. Even embarassed...hmmmm. I know much of this is because of how I ate last week and havent been exercising the way I want to. The girls there were much thinner than me and I felt and looked so frumpy in the mirror. These are feelings I havent seen in a while.
But, again, I am pulling the positive out of this. For the last few months when the scale has been stuck, I was having some thought of "maybe this is what I am capable of. Maybe this is where my body is comfortable and I cant lose anymore". Today was a reminder that I can do much better and make much better choices.
Today's reason for losing weight:
*to be happy with what I see in the mirror. For a while I was almost there! And I want to get back to that point. Regardless of what the scale says I can tone up there is nothing negative that can come from that! Helping myself by eating well and exercising is the best thing I can do for my morale. Lesson learned. I will add that to the list.
Today I am thankful for:
*having this whole revelation that I CAN do better. I CAN make better choices. I am thankful for the attitude to fight back instead of give up.
Have a great weekend!
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Honesty... (Jennifer)
The past few days have been rough. I have been hungry, had cravings, been exhausted, the whole nine yards. There has been minimal exercise and I just feel like crap. I am sure all those things feed off each other. I like to keep this blog as positive as I can. But honesty is important too, at least I think so :).
The hubs and I went to a wedding on Friday night. We had a rockstar time!!! We havent had that much fun in I dont know when. And that was the beginning of the downfall that has been happening until right this minute. I was out of my norm, my comfort zone. The whole weekend (right up until today) consisted of eating out meal after meal where I feel I failed miserably. Usually if I eat out I can manage pretty well. Not so much the past few days.
But something good has come of all this. It is "that time" for me so on top of not eating well and a lack of exercise, I am bloated and just feel BIG. And it was a wakeup call for me. A welcomed one too! I actually think it is great that gaining just a few lbs, thats what I assume anyway, and feeling such a huge difference in how I feel and how my clothes fit is awesome!!! It makes me realize that I wont let myself go back to who I was. Just a few lbs and I am uncomfortable. I dont like how I feel. Yipppeee!!!! It makes me wonder how the heck I let myself go from size 10 to size 22 at one point in my life. I dont even like how I feel after a few bad meals and no exercise!
Today's reason for losing weight:
*to FOREVER lose that uncomfortable feeling I walked around with for years and years. How it felt to always be just a bit too big for my clothes to fit comfortably, how I felt embarassed and ashamed most of the time, and how I felt out of control of myself. I have come so far along this journey !
Today I am thankful for:
*having the ability to recognize my mistakes, learn from them and get right back on track. The old Jen would have let a few bad eating days take over and then let them define me as a failure. Not this time. I am down 65(ish) lbs and this is all part of the journey. No one said it would be easy or perfect, right?
The hubs and I went to a wedding on Friday night. We had a rockstar time!!! We havent had that much fun in I dont know when. And that was the beginning of the downfall that has been happening until right this minute. I was out of my norm, my comfort zone. The whole weekend (right up until today) consisted of eating out meal after meal where I feel I failed miserably. Usually if I eat out I can manage pretty well. Not so much the past few days.
But something good has come of all this. It is "that time" for me so on top of not eating well and a lack of exercise, I am bloated and just feel BIG. And it was a wakeup call for me. A welcomed one too! I actually think it is great that gaining just a few lbs, thats what I assume anyway, and feeling such a huge difference in how I feel and how my clothes fit is awesome!!! It makes me realize that I wont let myself go back to who I was. Just a few lbs and I am uncomfortable. I dont like how I feel. Yipppeee!!!! It makes me wonder how the heck I let myself go from size 10 to size 22 at one point in my life. I dont even like how I feel after a few bad meals and no exercise!
Today's reason for losing weight:
*to FOREVER lose that uncomfortable feeling I walked around with for years and years. How it felt to always be just a bit too big for my clothes to fit comfortably, how I felt embarassed and ashamed most of the time, and how I felt out of control of myself. I have come so far along this journey !
Today I am thankful for:
*having the ability to recognize my mistakes, learn from them and get right back on track. The old Jen would have let a few bad eating days take over and then let them define me as a failure. Not this time. I am down 65(ish) lbs and this is all part of the journey. No one said it would be easy or perfect, right?
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Another little experiment (Jennifer)
I am full of experiments, huh? I have been keeping track not just of my calories per day but also WW points to see how they relate. I thought maybe it would provide some answers to my stall out on the scale. No such luck. But it really isnt that bad of a thing. It shows that I am eating the way I should be!!! Today's calorie intake was 1300. In WW points it was 24...which is what I am allowed to their standards.
I spoke to the trainer at the gym yesterday real quickly. I told her about my plateau and how it has been 4 months now. The first thing she said without asking any personal questions about weight, calories, etc, was: "You need to change something". Whether it is the intensity of my workout or what I am eating, something has to be changed to bump me out of this plateau. I have been thinking a lot about that. So today I went to the gym and did some newer things. I did the treadmill for a mile at 6mph. I also did this yesterday and both days I have been so suprised at just HOW tired I was after one mile. Exhausted really. I mean, I know I usually run at the 5mph range so this was an increase but I wonder if it was so much of an increase that would wipe the energy right out of me? I usually run 2-5 miles and not this exhausted. So I will make this my new challenge. One mile at 6mph on the treadmill until I am *comfortable* doing it. Anyway, then I got on the stair master. And I really challenged myself as those stairs were rolling under me. I did that for 10 minutes and got up to a pretty good speed by the end. A challenge felt good. Then........... I decided to get on this machine I have never tried. I dont even know what it is called or how to explain it other than you sit in a kind of laid back position and you put your feet on the foot paddles in front of you and move them up and down like scissors. You have to keep a constant speed or it clanks and such. It was a clankin away. So much the trainer came over probably to see what I was doing to this poor machine. hehe. It was the same trainer I talked to about my plateau. She told me to up the intensity and I whined...outloud...and even said I couldnt. She gave me the "dont give me that BS" look without any words. Then it hit me. THIS is what she means by upping the intensity to bump me out of my plateau. So I did. And sweat was dripping off the back of my hair onto my neck. I loved it.
Today's reason for losing weight:
* To be fit. Fit enough to exercise at higher intensities without giving up!
Today I am thankful for:
*My mom who wrote the sweetest comment on my 5K post the other day. It said:
Jen, I was SO proud to see you running by me, your father and the girls. You did it!!! What an amazing person you are, you set your mind and just DO IT!! You show your girls the right way to do things. I am bursting w/joy for you and your accomplishments in your life.
It means the world to me. It also makes me realize how much good can come out of expressing positive thoughts and feelings to others.
I spoke to the trainer at the gym yesterday real quickly. I told her about my plateau and how it has been 4 months now. The first thing she said without asking any personal questions about weight, calories, etc, was: "You need to change something". Whether it is the intensity of my workout or what I am eating, something has to be changed to bump me out of this plateau. I have been thinking a lot about that. So today I went to the gym and did some newer things. I did the treadmill for a mile at 6mph. I also did this yesterday and both days I have been so suprised at just HOW tired I was after one mile. Exhausted really. I mean, I know I usually run at the 5mph range so this was an increase but I wonder if it was so much of an increase that would wipe the energy right out of me? I usually run 2-5 miles and not this exhausted. So I will make this my new challenge. One mile at 6mph on the treadmill until I am *comfortable* doing it. Anyway, then I got on the stair master. And I really challenged myself as those stairs were rolling under me. I did that for 10 minutes and got up to a pretty good speed by the end. A challenge felt good. Then........... I decided to get on this machine I have never tried. I dont even know what it is called or how to explain it other than you sit in a kind of laid back position and you put your feet on the foot paddles in front of you and move them up and down like scissors. You have to keep a constant speed or it clanks and such. It was a clankin away. So much the trainer came over probably to see what I was doing to this poor machine. hehe. It was the same trainer I talked to about my plateau. She told me to up the intensity and I whined...outloud...and even said I couldnt. She gave me the "dont give me that BS" look without any words. Then it hit me. THIS is what she means by upping the intensity to bump me out of my plateau. So I did. And sweat was dripping off the back of my hair onto my neck. I loved it.
Today's reason for losing weight:
* To be fit. Fit enough to exercise at higher intensities without giving up!
Today I am thankful for:
*My mom who wrote the sweetest comment on my 5K post the other day. It said:
Jen, I was SO proud to see you running by me, your father and the girls. You did it!!! What an amazing person you are, you set your mind and just DO IT!! You show your girls the right way to do things. I am bursting w/joy for you and your accomplishments in your life.
It means the world to me. It also makes me realize how much good can come out of expressing positive thoughts and feelings to others.
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
This is it (Jennifer)
This is it. Its time. I have been at this same weight range (161-166) for several months. June actually. And for the most part I have been pretty accepting. I like that I have lost 60+ lbs. I have gotten comfortable in my new clothes and my new size. I have gotten comfortable with the new me. And while that is good for me, I still have work to do. And so I have been asking myself what I can do to get this last 20 lbs off. Why isnt the scale moving? And after a hard look at myself and my daily habits it is only me that is keeping me there. I need to stop feeling bad for myself that going to the gym and running should get me a weight loss every week. Enough thinking that this is all my body is capable of. There is always room for improvement and that is what I need to do. Improve. I am still on this journey. It hasnt ended. I dont think it ever will. It has been hard work even maintaining over the last few months.
So, its time to kick it back into gear as much as the ankle allows. More time at the gym, more DVD workouts at home, and much better accountability to what I am putting in my mouth. Not a bite of this, or a bite of that unrecorded. It is these things that will make the difference. And if they dont make a difference on the scale, its okay. Because I know that working out and eating well is healthy for my body. There is no harm that can be done from it. Even if the scale stays still my body will become healthier. I have noticed a little bit of a loss of my muscle tone from not exercising while my ankle was injured. Its great the scale stayed the same but sad that my body lost some muscle along the way. Another lesson learned. But I am in this for the long haul :)
It's on...
So, its time to kick it back into gear as much as the ankle allows. More time at the gym, more DVD workouts at home, and much better accountability to what I am putting in my mouth. Not a bite of this, or a bite of that unrecorded. It is these things that will make the difference. And if they dont make a difference on the scale, its okay. Because I know that working out and eating well is healthy for my body. There is no harm that can be done from it. Even if the scale stays still my body will become healthier. I have noticed a little bit of a loss of my muscle tone from not exercising while my ankle was injured. Its great the scale stayed the same but sad that my body lost some muscle along the way. Another lesson learned. But I am in this for the long haul :)
It's on...
Sunday, October 3, 2010
5K pictures -as promised! (Jennifer)
Here are the pictures to go along with my post(see below) from earlier today.
I was shaking in my sneaks here. So nervous!
This is a great pic(thanks Ron) of the large crowd of runners...and this isnt even everyone.
And we're off....
There I am coming up to the finish line!
I am to the left of the balloon :)
All done and home...
For those of you who have done 5k's are most of them like this???
Hope you enjoyed the pics and video!
I was shaking in my sneaks here. So nervous!
This is a great pic(thanks Ron) of the large crowd of runners...and this isnt even everyone.
And we're off....
There I am coming up to the finish line!
I am to the left of the balloon :)
All done and home...Here is a video that will give you an idea of just how many people were running this race(about 2100 or so I think).
For those of you who have done 5k's are most of them like this???
Hope you enjoyed the pics and video!
A little surprise! (Jennifer)
First, I would like to say thank you to those of you who made such sweet comments on my pictures from the last post. Thank you so much!!! Its these comments that help me along in this journey.
Now, on to the surprise...
I am a spontaneous person. Always have been. My original plan this weekend was to bring the kids to my moms house. I was going to have some Jennifer time. I dont come by that too often these days. But on Friday I convinced myself to go too...and signed myself up for the Komen Race for the Cure (5k) at the Empire State Plaza!!! I dont do downtown Albany well so my dad drove me down and I signed up Friday night for the run on Saturday morning. I was petrified, even while signing up. I paid my fee, got a bib number, a microchip for my shoe to track my time, a T-shirt and I was in! I doubted myself a little and I was a little surprised by my nerves! I went out with Teresa(dress shopping for a wedding I have) Friday night and we had a great time, although our eating choices werent stellar by any means. I went to bed later than normal with a full tummy which proved not to be a smart idea in combination with my nerves. I didnt sleep well and when I did sleep I was dreaming about the race(totally serious)! I knew it was going to be a very large crowd and parking would be tough so I wanted to get there early. I couldnt sleep anyway. I was so excited and proud that I was doing it all by myself...or at least that I made the decision to do it!
I had a little support system too! My parents, both my girls, and Ron came to the race to cheer me on! The hubs had to work. It was a surreal experience. There were thousands of people there...literally. I started out in the back because I knew I shouldnt be anywhere near the 6, 7, and 8 minute per mile signs in the front of starting line. The only goal I had for myself was to run the whole thing. And I did it!!!! I just started my running back up after my ankle injury one week ago so I wasnt sure what to expect. Once the race started it was like a minute and half before I actually got to the blue mat to start running(apparently the blue mat starts your personal running time...this is all new to me) because there were just so many people running(over 2000 not including the walking group that started an hour later). I have pictures and I will post them on my next post when I get home! My total finishing time was 35:09 and my chip time was 33:33...which makes sense because even though the clock started I was in the back and didnt start running and until a minute and a half later.
What an experience. There was free food and water. People everywhere! There was music, and just a great atmosphere overall. The people standing on the street cheering you on, the runners screaming in pride, passing people, being passed, water stations and empty cups flying in the air, the time boards, police security, the notes on peoples backs saying who they were running for, the sunny cool weather, the women with "Survivor" shirts on, the women with bandanas with no hair, the obvious support systems involved, the children running, the nerves, excitement, and then finishing. Yes, finishing. The race started uphill and ended going down that same hill to the Empire State Plaza. And the people there screaming and cheering "You are almost there!!!!." There were thousands of people cheering us on. I get choked up just thinking about it again. It was a truly amazing experience.
It was surreal and I am so happy I was a part of it. I am happy for my personal growth, but even more happy to be part of such a great event for a wonderful cause. I promise pictures in the next post.
Now, on to the surprise...
I am a spontaneous person. Always have been. My original plan this weekend was to bring the kids to my moms house. I was going to have some Jennifer time. I dont come by that too often these days. But on Friday I convinced myself to go too...and signed myself up for the Komen Race for the Cure (5k) at the Empire State Plaza!!! I dont do downtown Albany well so my dad drove me down and I signed up Friday night for the run on Saturday morning. I was petrified, even while signing up. I paid my fee, got a bib number, a microchip for my shoe to track my time, a T-shirt and I was in! I doubted myself a little and I was a little surprised by my nerves! I went out with Teresa(dress shopping for a wedding I have) Friday night and we had a great time, although our eating choices werent stellar by any means. I went to bed later than normal with a full tummy which proved not to be a smart idea in combination with my nerves. I didnt sleep well and when I did sleep I was dreaming about the race(totally serious)! I knew it was going to be a very large crowd and parking would be tough so I wanted to get there early. I couldnt sleep anyway. I was so excited and proud that I was doing it all by myself...or at least that I made the decision to do it!
I had a little support system too! My parents, both my girls, and Ron came to the race to cheer me on! The hubs had to work. It was a surreal experience. There were thousands of people there...literally. I started out in the back because I knew I shouldnt be anywhere near the 6, 7, and 8 minute per mile signs in the front of starting line. The only goal I had for myself was to run the whole thing. And I did it!!!! I just started my running back up after my ankle injury one week ago so I wasnt sure what to expect. Once the race started it was like a minute and half before I actually got to the blue mat to start running(apparently the blue mat starts your personal running time...this is all new to me) because there were just so many people running(over 2000 not including the walking group that started an hour later). I have pictures and I will post them on my next post when I get home! My total finishing time was 35:09 and my chip time was 33:33...which makes sense because even though the clock started I was in the back and didnt start running and until a minute and a half later.
What an experience. There was free food and water. People everywhere! There was music, and just a great atmosphere overall. The people standing on the street cheering you on, the runners screaming in pride, passing people, being passed, water stations and empty cups flying in the air, the time boards, police security, the notes on peoples backs saying who they were running for, the sunny cool weather, the women with "Survivor" shirts on, the women with bandanas with no hair, the obvious support systems involved, the children running, the nerves, excitement, and then finishing. Yes, finishing. The race started uphill and ended going down that same hill to the Empire State Plaza. And the people there screaming and cheering "You are almost there!!!!." There were thousands of people cheering us on. I get choked up just thinking about it again. It was a truly amazing experience.
It was surreal and I am so happy I was a part of it. I am happy for my personal growth, but even more happy to be part of such a great event for a wonderful cause. I promise pictures in the next post.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
