A Goal? (Tricia)

My friend Brooke asked me today if I had a weight loss goal in mind. And, as I stated in previous posts, I really haven't had one. My first real goal was to lose 20lbs, which I did. I have stayed on plan for the past 7 weeks and have been able to drop a total of 30lbs altogether. I have been thinking about a larger goal for myself recently, but I haven't been able to come up with a firm number that I want to see on the scale. I think the reason for this is because I am scared that if I put a number to it, then I will have to be super committed and I don't like the idea of failing. I don't want to let myself down. I am not unrealistic either. I don't think I will ever get down to an ideal weight for my height, I think I will always be the chubby girl and I am pretty ok with that. But I have been tossing around the thought of the weight I would like to be at...yeah, still drawing a blank.

Another question that goes along with that is how long I plan on staying on Medifast? It is an expensive program, but it is working. Its working mainly because it is very structured. On all the other diets, I felt I had too much room and if I cheated one night, I could always start again tomorrow. But that is not how it works with Medifast, its all or nothing and I like that. And, I am pretty sure I am worth the cost of Medifast, as long as I am sticking to it and it works for me. I do know that after I transition off of the plan, which takes several weeks and slowly introduces foods that are not on the diet, I will start WW again to continue to lose the additional pounds. I am looking at Medifast as the beginning of me changing my habits and the jump start to what I am sure will be a long process, followed with a lifetime commitment of battling my inner fat kid.

Saying what I really want to lose is just too big of a number, and a little embarrassing, so lets just say it is a three digit number. And the idea that it has taken me almost 8 weeks to lose 30lbs, how long will it take to lose that larger number? Well, me being a little OCD and a planner, I would say that if I stayed on Medifast for the bulk of the weight loss..taking into account that my first month will be the biggest weight loss, I anticipate another..7 months on the plan. 7 months! That would take me until November! And then a transition to WW for the remainder of the weight. Oh, good grief...and this is usually the point what my procrastination and avoidance kicks in and I stop thinking of a weight loss goal because I get overwhelmed. I repeat... 7 months! Ok, ok, I am refocusing...breathing...So lets go back to basics. I can't keep thinking of a goal weight. I can't think about how long this is going to take me. I have to think smaller. Like, 50 lbs down. considering I am at 30, 50 sounds like a reasonable goal. Not too far away and achievable. After I lose 50, I can re-evaluate the situation and make another goal. (yes, I am trying to talk myself into it). Ok, 50 it is. That would put me at my pre-wedding weight and surly I would be able to buy some new clothes then. Can I get a "YAY 50?"