Last chance workout (Jennifer)

Fact: I love The Biggest Loser. I get all excited for Tuesdays to come because that show is so great and motivates me.

Another Fact: today when I went onto the blog I saw that Tricia had added a picture to her name. It is the picture of her and I on her wedding day. I dont know if I never saw the picture or was in denial or what...but I was astonished to see myself in that picture. Trish...you look great. However...it brought new light to me that I was much bigger than I thought I was at that point...or at ANY point for that matter. I thought my heaviest point was a little over a year ago when I weighed 226.5 lbs. Clearly I did not own a scale around the time of Tricia's wedding. So I sent the pic around to some people to see what they thought. Yup...the same as me. Except for my dear mother. Gotta love your mother. She said "Jen, I have never seen you that big. It must be the picture." Thanks mom :)

So, putting these two things together made me realize a few things. First, I am glad Trish has that picture up there. It was a very happy day and it an excellent reference point for me. All of a sudden I realized that while I am still overweight I have come so far from where I was. And that is because of my hard work. It didnt happen because I dreamed it would. It happened because I worked hard and made it happen! Having said that...tomorrow is weigh day for me and I am excited. I want to give all I have. So tonight, just like on the Biggest Loser, I got my butt on the treadmill and did a "last chance workout". I pushed myself pretty hard knowing that I have made progress from where I was.

Today's reason for losing weight:
*to wear a smaller bra. Yup...thats right. Not what most women say but it is definately what I want.

Just a few notes from a fat girl (Tricia)

1)I DID go to the gym today again and did a mile on the treadmill. I have a blister on my foot, but I am not really sad about it. YAY!
2) After some persistent nagging (you know who you are) I decided to join our company’s walk for a charity. I have less than two months to prepare for a three mile walk. Some people train for a marathon, this fat girl trains for a walk. Hehe.
3)I discovered that I really do not like the creamy tomato soup from Medifast. I had to chug it down.
4)It has been brought to my attention that I did not mention one of my other top supporters from work in my blog yesterday. Please accept this letter of apology from me:
Dearest D-man,
I regret that I neglected to mention you in yesterday’s post. I truly appreciate your constant support of my weight loss efforts. Your consistent water-intake monitoring skills are outstanding and I dearly hope that you continue to undergo this tremendous effort in keeping my hydrated. If you could find it in your heart to forgive me for this mammoth oversight, it would be much appreciated. I look forward to your continuous encouragement in the future.
Sincerely,
T-bone.

P.S. I am also available for recommendation letters.

A different kind of day... (Jennifer)

Today was a different kind of day for me. I have been feeling unsatisfied all day and finding myself waiting to have my next meal. The day started off full speed. I didnt sleep well last night at all. This morning I realized Olivia (age 3) had an "accident" in her bed last night. So before 8:00 am I had two bathed, dressed, and fed little girls and was already doing laundry! When the girls took a nap, I laid on the couch. I dont ever do this!!! Ever!!!! I was awaiting my lean and green for most of the day. Except...when the time got here ( I even made myself wait until 4:45 despite me trying to tell myself that 3:00 was okay to eat dinner) I didnt even finish it. I mean, I was hungry but just didnt feel my usual satisfaction. In the little bit of quality sleep that I did get last night I managed to dream that I "cheated" and had a piece of pizza. I spent the rest of my dream trying to calculate how many carbs it had it and how many medifast meals I would have to skip to make up for this. I should mention right now that I have not ever cheated and if I did I would not skip medifast meals to make up for it. At any rate...that was the dream I woke up from this morning!
Then something happened tonight that I realized hasnt happened in over a month since I have started Medifast. I found myself staring in the refrigerator. There I was...standing in front of the fridge with the door open. And then it hit me...."what are you doing?". I havent done this in so long. I have been on such a structured routine that I never "need" to do this. It never even crossed my mind. So why tonight? Am I hungry? Yes, but not starving. Am I just looking for something "yummy" to eat to comfort me? Because I am tired and a bit sluggish today? I just dont know. I spent most of the day unsatisfied. And I just keep asking myself why? What was different today?
I did not give in to my desire to eat "other stuff" so for that I am proud of me. But still...today was a bit of a challenge for me. It may be because I picked up a pizza for my husband and the girls on the way home from Zumba last night. It smelled sooooo good in the car but once I got home and ate my dinner while they ate theirs it didnt bother me anymore. I was totally satisfied with my dinner. Today Steven went to Walmart because we needed a few things. I was tired so decided to stay home. Doesnt he come home with mozzerella sticks, buffalo chicken and popcorn chicken...all hot and ready to go. Yummmmmmm. I actually felt like I was missing out. I dont usually feel this with a temptation. I held those things in my hand as I got their plates ready and sniffed..and sniffed again. I love mozz sticks, and breaded chicken too for that matter. Usually we will all eat the same thing for dinner(or at least a close variation) but sometimes it isnt that easy. The girls are picky, Steven even more picky (he eats no condiments and no veggies other than potatoes) and my lean and green is pretty limited. I am just hoping I wake up a little less pity party-ish tomorrow morning!!! I am sure these days are going to happen and I should probably feel grateful that it has been a month and this is the first!!

And I also realized something else. It is these days that made WW so hard for me. Because it is not rigid(enough for me) and I would give in when things got tough. Shoot...I did give in and that is why I was such a great maintainer and not such a great loser! So it is the rigid aspect Medifast that saved me today. Had I been on any other "diet" I would have thrown in the towel and had to live with the feeling of guilt afterwards. Dont get me wrong...I think WW is a great program hands down, and I have dont it several times. But when things got stressful (and they were for a while there) I would lose sight of the boundaries and give in. Medifast is black and white and WW has some gray areas that I didnt have the willpower to handle correctly. I actually look forward to doing WW to maintain after my Medifast days. So please....dont take any disrespect from what I am saying at all. I give all the credit in the world to people who have such great willpower!!!
Today's reason for losing weight:
*I want to have more energy to do all of the things I want to do. I want to keep up with the kids, do yardwork until its done, not until I am too tired to do anymore. I want to not dread laundry because it is "all the way downstairs". I want to be energized so when the kids go to bed I will clean clean clean instead of plop on the couch. And for the most part I am proud to say that most of these items are improving!!!

Commitment issues (Tricia)

I know in my past blogs I have talked about starting to walk. And I did- at first. I walked around our building with Naomi after work. And then it got cold. And rainy. And windy. And…I just didn’t want to! So Naomi has been trying to get me into the gym after work. We are privileged enough to have a gym in our office building as a courtesy to the employees. For those of you who don’t know, I work at a small health insurance company. My employer, trying to set a good example for the community, tries to promote healthy living to its employees by not only offering the gym, but other healthy lifestyle classes and support, which is great, if I were a person who follows through on those things. However, I have commitment issues. There. I said it.
Now, I am not sure why I have this problem. Well, that’s a lie. I am lazy. Shocking, I know. I would think that it would be much harder for me to leave work, go to a gym, work out, and then go home. But no. Apparently it is hard for me to shut my computer off, walk down the stairs, and choose either to go to the left to the gym, or go to the right and go home. Which instinct do I have? To go to the right. I know this is the wrong choice. I know that I can try and justify it by telling myself that I have things to do at home or I have to run errand, etc. But really, those things can’t wait a half hour? The laundry is going to throw a tantrum if it doesn’t get put in the drier by 6? The dinner thawing in the fridge is going to run away from home? Um, no. And its not just convincing myself to turn left the first time. Its every time. I can go to the gym one day and remember how good it feels to get my heart pumping and my endorphins up ( yes, I remember, Nay). But it’s the next day, and the day after that, and the week after that. I have to have an internal fight with myself every day to make the correct choice. It really is like having the devil and the angel on my shoulders. “Turn left FATTY,” said the angel (yes, apparently I have a mean angel). “ Go home and sit on the couch,” said the devil. Hm..which should I choose? And when I can’t decide, I do more rationalizing. I can tell myself that I will go to the gym tomorrow, but tomorrow never comes and months go by until Nay pushes me back into the gym. She is like a little stalker…Tricia, did you bring your sneakers? Um, no Nay, I forgot. Tricia, are you coming down stairs at 5? Um, no Nay, I have to go home. Tricia, are you really going to come to the gym today? Yes, Nay-pout-I am coming to the gym today. I say she is a stalker jokingly because she really is a great friend and she is doing it to support me and my weight loss and I appreciate her stalking every time she does it.
To go along with my commitment issue, I also know I have a judgment issue. You know what I am talking about. The fat girl on the elliptical gets the sideways looks from the skinny people next to her. I am sure they are not thinking “Look at her, trying to improve herself. Right on sister!’” I really know they are thinking, “Ok, who let the whale in?” or “OMG, she is totally going to break that machine.” Or “ She is sweating like the pig that she is.” I hate that feeling. The feeling that I don’t belong there. Like I shouldn’t be on the swing set with the cool kids at school. That awkward feeling that makes us remember we are not like them.
I do have a point to this story: I am wondering, is it just me that doesn’t want to work out? Jennifer loves it and gets her “me” time. But what about the other over-sized people out there? What about the skinny people out there? Do the skinny people really like to work out? And if so, is it because they know they are doing something good for their body? Does it make them feel good or in control over themselves? Do they like the endorphin high and find it addicting? Is it a behavior they have always had and I didn’t learn? I want to know what the secret is. So if any of you out there are skinny exercisers, please fill me in!!
I know that this is something I have to overcome. I know that I need an ah-ha moment that caused me to start this weight-loss journey. But until I get it, I am glad I have Jennifer, Teresa, and Naomi to keep pushing me to do it. I have to make that decision at the end of the day to turn left.
So, today I am not going to say why I want to lose the weight. Instead, I am going to say what I want out of this moment. I want to say proudly that I am going to the gym. I want to not weigh my options and just do it (please insert Nike trademark here). I want to make myself feel like I belong there.

Tony Little (Jennifer)

I usually dont abandon the blog for the whole weekend but it was a busy one! We had company this weekend. But...I did manage to exercise! On Friday night Steven and I decided to give Tony Little a whirl. It has been a while since we have done his DVD. We are both firm believers in him and his weight loss method as we saw 40 lbs melt off of me( I gained 20 back from the steroids the dr had me on though) the last time we used his DVD. We both had firmed up a lot and noticed a huge difference in metabolism. It is pretty much a 20 minute workout consisting of 8 exercises(each 2 minutes or less) that you do on your own level (beginnner, intermediate, and advanced.) I started out with 3 lb weights this time and did intermediate/advanced on all the exercises. I used to be able to use 5lb weights and do advanced but I will work myself back up to that point with time. I find Tony Little to be so motivating and inspirational. There is just something about him. And other people must agree because I know lots of people who started to do his DVD when my weight started coming off. It boosts your metabolism with simple exercises. It also firms you up pretty good. That is what I am aiming for although a better metabolism will definately help especially when the day comes for me to transition off Medifast. My husband even enjoys Tony Little so we work out together when we can. He gives us both a great workout, yet it is pretty simple and quick. Anyway...enough of my infomercial for Tony Little. But hey...do what works right? and let me tell you...24 hours after I worked out I was really feeling it!!! I got back into Tony Little because I gave my friend Karen his dvd the other day. HAve you tried it yet Karen?

On Saturday my inlaws came but I managed to take a walk before. I did my usual walk and then decided to go check out the path to the lake. So Sugar and I walked it and it was beautiful. We walked back to our regular end point and then jogged home. I figure maybe it was 3 miles all together with about a mile jogged and 2 walked. Not bad! Then last night I was feeling tired so I was not going to work out. But Steven was going to regardless. So I muttered some cranky words but made myself do it. I decided I would take it "easy" and walk on the treadmill...with incline. I experienced a totally different form of exercise for myself and was shocked with the results. I put it on a 10 incline and speed of 2.5 which is a slower walking speed(for me). But since the the incline was on 10 I was really doggin' it! It was a different feeling than when I walk outside or when I jog. It felt like my lungs were getting a workout. I was huffin and puffin pretty hard but didnt have that uncomfortable I cant wait to stop feeling like when I jog. I did the full 30 minutes and realized that I had burned more calories than when I get on there with a walk/jog. I was almost at 300 calories and I was so motivated that I put the treadmill on 6 mph for 2 minutes which is a lot for me. But I did it and there was that regular exercise feeling I got. I felt so accomplished with my 300 calories burned especially since I wasnt even going to work out. Props to my husband for the motivation :)

Another thing I realized this weekend is that the last time my inlaws were here I really struggled with all the "goodies" everyone was eating, and with eating out. It wasnt until last night that I realized that I wasnt tempted much at all this weekend. Well, except for the Wegmans sub Steven was eating on Saturday. Now...for that I will admit that I was totally drooling over just the smell of it. I picked it up and sniffed and shut my eyes. I must have really looked like a fat girl at that point...but...I was a fat girl in control!!! Whoopie! It was at that point that I knew what my first non Medifast meal would be when the day comes. In moderation of course...
But all in all the weekend was a success! Medifast has made me very aware of all the foods out there that I am not eating that I normally would be...and their nutritional values(well...usually the lack there of).

Tonight is Zumba and I am excited. Chicken and a veggie for dinner tonight.

Today's reason for losing weight:
*to see a picture of myself and not think "OMG...I look so fat". This kinda happened to me yesterday. We colored eggs this weekend and I asked Steven to take some pics of the girls. I was in some and when I saw them I thought..."wow, maybe I AM making progress." Dont be mistaken...I was certainly not thinking that I looked great or thin...but I did see a difference :)

One month down (Tricia)

Weigh in day! I am down 3.3lbs this week for a total of 19.5. I am so happy! I didn't quite make my 20lb goal, but I am close enough and I will take it! So for some reviews of the food I have been eating:
S'mores bars- SOO good
Cream of chicken soup--delish with a boulon cube in it
Tomato cream soup-passable
Cappuccino-terrific
Strawberry shake-tastes like an ice cream shake.
Puffs, Parmesan and chili nacho- Yummmy and you get a ton of them in a bag.

I am pretty happy with my food choices for the next month. I still have some things that I haven't tried yet, so I will keep you updated.
Tonight for dinner I had a nice big salad with a cup of Boston let. 1/2 cup of cucumbers, and 6 oz of chicken from a rotisserie. It was really big and filling. Tomorrow I am going to attempt to create a quiche!

my reason today for losing the weight:
More clothes shopping!

Much to my surprise (Jennifer)

So I have been posting about how I have been walking down along the lake and then jogging home. I really had no concept what distance this was. So yesterday I drove the distance with my car so I could know. I figured maybe it was a half mile road but really had no idea. My husband was certain it was more. Well he was right! It was almost a mile each way! So that means not only did I walk the mile but I JOGGED A FULL MILE BACK!!! ME!!! This is quite an accomplishment for me. I had no idea it was that far or that I was even capable of it! I came back and I was boasting with happiness and pride while telling my husband! It is like I am finding this new person inside...a person I actually like :) Again...a new concept for me!
This morning it was below freezing so I decided not to go out for my walk/run. It sure did look nice out since the sun is out though! So I went downstairs with the girls and while they were playing together I hopped on the treadmill. I did one of the preprogrammed personal trainer workouts. It was just walking for a half hour at varying speeds and inclines. The incline is a great tool! I was sweating when I was done. And since the girls were still playing amazingly well together I decided when the half hour was up I would challenge myself for ten more minutes. So I put the speed on 2.5 (a walk) and the incline on 10. This was a great change of pace for me and really worked my leg muscles and made me sweat! I felt so accomplished when I was done. I am loving that feeling!
One thing that I am totally unhappy with and increasingly aware of is this bad breath I have got going on. I dont know if eating tuna and pickes for dinner last night made it worse or what but this morning when I woke up my breath was so bad that I couldnt even stand myself. Now...that is bad. So I immediately got up and brushed my teeth for like ever before I did anything else...and it wasnt even a few minutes before it was back. Its this awful taste in my mouth that I just cant get rid of. Even after breakfast it was still there. I think I will have to chew gum all day today.
Today's reason for losing weight:
*to put on a bathing suit and not feel self conscious.

Trying to keep pace (Teresa)

Well I went to the gym again yesterday and there is something about working out and tanning that can really make a girl happy. I have been all off schedule this week. My aunt was in the hospital so Shea had to make the rounds at the grandparents houses while we went off to work. Just a little glitch in the schedule can really mess with your timing! Anyway my aunt is better and things are back to normal so packing my lunches will be much easier now! I have decided to do ww hardcore until the end of April. If I am not down a good amount (30 lbs would be nice) I am going to suck it up and start Medifast. I really want to lose weight I want to wear a bikini this summer! Perhaps shop at Victoria Secrets without everyone wondering what my fat ass is doing in there and further more what I will fit in! Tricia and Jen I am so proud of you both!!! Jen you look great and Tricia I cannot wait to see you!!! And you wear whatever you want girl!! My reason for wanting to lose weight today is: I want to to be the one who looks good naked rather than everyone else.

Weigh Day~1 month down (Jennifer)

I got on the scale and lost 3 lbs this week for a total of 17.5 this month! Yaay me! I am excited. I was actually excited to get on the scale this morning because I knew that I had exercised this week and did all that I could do to help me! I made the effort and it payed off. And the feeling that I get when I exercise is great...well, when I am done of course :) I feel happy and proud and like I am doing something to help myself! This overall feeling isnt something I have felt in a while. And I am really enjoying it.
Yesterday I took the girls on a wagon ride which is harder than it sounds pulling 55 extra lbs up and down hills. But it was fun. It turned into quite a little nature walk. We saw a beaver(ish) animal, a crane looking really tall bird in the creek, two dogs, and some cockadoodledooing roosters which the kids enjoyed imitating. It made the walk interesting and different. Every time I saw an animal I would chuckle and ask myself "what next?" Today I took Sugar out for a walk and jogged home. She was "doggin it" on the way home when we were jogging. but since I am being told she looks like a stuffed sausage I figure it is good for her. Other than a fenced dog, a horse, and some flying geese there wasnt quite the excitement of yesterday. But the weather and timing was great. It was sunny but chipper. And it is only March so no "skeeters". Perfect weather to sweat in too. I cant stand to sweat in the heat. That probably sounds awful and lazy of me but it is true. Anyway, it was a half hour of time to myself to better myself. This is a new concept for me as a stay at home mom and I love it. Just a half hour refreshes me. I am thankful to my husband since he is all for it. He told me the other day that I have been in a better mood since starting Medifast. Just knowing I am trying to help myself has done wonders for me. Again...a new concept for me.
Today's reason for wanting to lose the weight:
*I love when people notice and comment that I lost some weight! It keeps my motivation up and makes me proud of me :)

Lean and green for lunch.... (Jennifer)

I too got my food today and I was so excited. I had food in the cabinet but was pretty much out of my favorites. I had eaten my last bar :( Today I went out to lunch with family and it was the first time I used my lean and green at lunchtime. I wasnt sure how that would work for me or if I would be hungry the rest of the day. It actually wasnt bad at all! At first I ordered a chicken ceasar salad thinking I could get some kind of light dressing on the side. But....apparently Applebees doesnt offer even one light dressing. Awful!!! And FYI apparently they also dont offer nutritional info online either. What a disappointment for such a large chain. But anyway...I then changed my order to a 7 oz sirloin and steamed broccoli. I believe the weight of the steak is before being cooked and I figured that by the time I trimmed all the fat off it would be my allowed 5 oz. I have never been much of a steak-y person but am all of a sudden finding I really enjoy it at times. My steak was soooo good today. I offered my husband a piece but he obviously saw my enjoyment and said "no...go ahead..you eat it". It was cooked perfect, very little fat and very tender. YUMMMM.. I was totally satisfied with my lean and green today. I had no hunger the rest of the day. I did leave some broccoli on the plate though since I dont want to add the extra carbs if I go over the cup and a half allowance. I dont really have too great of a grasp when meausring that stuff.
So then we got home and there was my food waiting for me! I was so excited. I am trying a few new things this time around. I got the appetite suppressant chocolate shake, the smores bar( tried it today and I LOVE THIS), the flavor infusers and some cappuccino. So I will be sure to comment about those in the future.
Tomorrow is weigh day and I am really looking forward to it. I am happy to report that I did my challenge of exercising 5 times this week since my last weigh in. I am hoping my hard work reflects on the scale. Although I have to say that I have felt so good about me just by doing a half hour of exercise! But seeing that it gives great results would motivate me even more. This has made me realize that I want to continue to feel good about me. So stay tuned for my results tomorrow morning!

Today's reason for wanting to lose weight:
* I am certainly not "skinny" but this great feeling that has come over me is WAY better than any feeling I could get from eating any food...even pizza :) Having said that...I want to have good self esteem by making the right choices for myself. This goes a long way and overflows into other parts of my life I am noticing.

Food- YAY! (Tricia)

I have been stalking the UPS site all day to see when my food was coming. I was desperately low and ate three bars and a shake today. But when I got home, there it was!! I am so excited to try all of the new things! I got:
Shakes: Dutch chocolate, mocha, strawberry cream, appetite suppressant choc and vanilla
bars: peanut butter, caramel, s'mores, strawberry crunch, and oatmeal raisin
Snacks: Parmesan and nacho chili puffs and cinnamon and honey mustard pretzels
Soups: chili, cream of chicken, and tomato
pudding: Chocolate and vanilla

Hopefully this will be a big variety and I can change it up every day!
I am also super excited to report that I tried on pants that I got at Christmas that were too small and they now fit. Hello to all the clothes I have been saving until I "lost some weight" or clothes that I kept in the back of the closet that I was determined to fit into. Not just smaller sizes, but just clothes of the same size that were just cut in a way that they didn't fit me. Well, not any more! This fatty is going to wear them, even if they are not in style, just because I CAN!

For years I have avoided looking in the mirror from the neck down because I really was never happy with what I saw. But today I snuck a peak in the ladies room and I can see it! My arms, my face, my muffin top, my FUPA (fat upper private area as we like to call it), and I actually have a neck now instead of just the layer of fat between my chins and my chest. This was my motivation to keep going. Who knew that just a little weight loss yield such results! Well, bring it on summer, I have some tanks at the bottom of the drawer that I haven't worn yet.

Good luck on your weigh- in tomorrow Jennifer! Call me first thing in the morning. I am so glad you were able to eat your lean in green meal at lunch today so you didn't feel deprived watching everyone else eat. Good for you!

Cupcakes! (Tricia)

At work we decorate people’s desks and bring in treats for birthdays. It was my turn to bring in desert for a birthday today, so I made some cupcakes. I went to walmart last week and picked up my supplies and thought it would be no problem to make. I did take a few minutes to decide which delicious flavor to buy. Strawberry? Um, no. Chocolate, uh-uh. Yellow ? Of course! Chocolate frosting? Delish! Now can someone tell me why I bought my favorite flavor cake mix? Was I secretly trying to test myself or perhaps subconsciously trying to sabotage myself? UH, I think the answer was the sabotaging. I made the cake batter last night while my husband was out to make sure he wouldn’t eat any. As I was scooping the mix into the little cups, I realized that this was a terrible idea. He wasn’t there to eat the cupcakes, but he also wasn’t there to make sure I didn’t eat the batter or the cupcakes! The batter is my favorite part. Who can resist the yummy goodness? I wanted to lick the spatula, the beaters, stick my whole head into the bowl. My whole head! Picture that! Nate walking into the house and seeing me in the kitchen wearing the mixing bowl trying to reach every drip of batter from the bowl like a dog would. What would he do? Walk over, take the bowl, swat my nose and say “ NO! Bad Tricia!” I think I would growl :-)
But I did stop myself and realize that I don’t need to have anyone tell me no. I can tell myself no. So, I put the bowl, beaters, spatula etc in the sink and filled it with water and soap right away. I cooled the cupcakes, spread on the frosting, and put them in the carry container. I even left one out for Nate as a treat. I brought them to work and watched everyone eat them. When I asked if they were good, all of my supportive friends said (still in mid-mouthful) No, they are terrible, you don’t want any. Thanks guys, but I really hope they were good :-)
What was my reward for not sticking my head into the batter bowl last night? I put on my dress pants this morning and realized I couldn’t pull the draw strings any tighter and they were still too big. Nothing is sweeter than that!
As Jennifer mentioned, I did stop by and visit her and the girls at Nanny’s yesterday. I love spending time with them, but we are three hours away and it makes it tough. Jennifer, I can’t WAIT to come out for a few days in April to celebrate my and Emma’s birthday! Then we can cook our lean and greens together!

freedom (Teresa)

So I went to the gym yesterday for the first time in a year! It has been really tough to go since the birth of our son. It felt great! Not only did I feel wonderful because I was active and getting healthy but it was the first time since Shea was born that I did something without a plan. I did not plan ahead I wanted to go so I did. I know that does not seem like much but anyone with kids can relate. I find myself being more productive and I have a ton more energy....exciting. I am at the point now that food is no longer my focus...getting healthy and looking good is. I see all these summer clothes coming out that are sooooooooooooooooo cute I cannot wait to wear them!

Monday = Zumba day! (Jennifer)

Its Monday and I went to Zumba tonight. I am proud to say that I felt that I did better! I mean...I was still falling over myself at any given moment but for the most part I seemed to be getting the moves down! I am still "the fat girl" there but I dont feel so bad when I know that I am there to better myself. I left there all sweaty and with a red face which was great! I felt like I had accomplished a lot!!! Then I went to dinner with Karen. I got there a few minutes early so I took the time to carefully review the menu. I knew just what I wanted and wasnt afraid to ask for it(well I was a little afraid but the waiter didnt look like he would bite :). Of course...what I wanted was not on the menu. I ordered the chicken and steak grilled fajitas without the tortillas or anything it came with actually. Then I asked him for a side of lettuce. And I had a little light dressing. And much to my surprise the food came out just the way I wanted it to! A large plate of lettuce with a small piece of chicken and an even smaller piece of steak (fajita style). I was so happy and even called the waiter my hero :) The whole dinner was excellent (thanks Karen!!!). The steak did taste so good buy kinda salty. But it was excellent and it reminded me that I am very capable of eating out :)
I went home for the weekend to see my family. It was a great time and much needed. I decided to stay an extra night and came home this morning. I had packed a few extra meals as I was trying to be prepared but still ran short one meal because I decided to stay the extra night. But no fears....Trish was there to the rescue(you are the best Trish!). She came over to Nanny's today to visit me and the girls and brought me a bar. See...now that is love and support of an awesome cousin :) Glad we are in this together. And Trish...you look great!

Chili's (Tricia)

I had the day off to do my taxes, take nate to the dr, and an unexpected trip to the car dealership. Nate wanted to stop and get lunch and he wanted to go to Chili's. So I got a little steak and some steamed broccoli. I ate the stake and took one bite of the broccoli. I couldnt even swallow another bite of it. I suddenly hated broccoli. Now, I have eaten it a lot over the past few weeks so I am sure that I am just sick of it. I had to leave the whole plate of it for the waitress to pick up. I couldnt even look at it! I decided to eat my veggies later and that way I can make sure I get all of my lean and green in. I decided that me and broccoli are on a break, at least for a while.

Small success (Teresa)

Well usually when the tough gets going for me the tough gets eating....but not this time! After one of the most emotionally challenging weekends of my life, for the first time I did not use food to make me feel better!!! I am really proud of myself. I am not sure how much weight I lost this week but I am down a total of 11lbs since we started our journey! Summer here we come!!! I watched the Kristie Alley show last night and it was a great motivation. She is really fat again and now she is documenting her weight loss journey on TV! It reminded me not to go back to my old ways...she looks really bad. Have a great day!

Enjoying my challenge (Jennifer)

So I have never been one to exercise and enjoy it. There has always been a purpose to my exercise...and that was to lose weight. However, since I have joined Zumba it has made me realize that I can exercise while having fun! And to take things a step further...I have been walking down one of the roads along the lake near my house. When I get to the end I turn around and jog back! Me! Now...this is an amazing thing for me. I dont dread it. I actually have been enjoying it. I bring my IPOD and sometimes Sugar and it is totally great! I am sure that part of the reason I am enjoying so much is because the weather has been great. A little chipper in the morning with some sun. I am the first to tell you that I am NOT a jolly person in the heat. We bought a new house last summer and lets just say my husband has agreed to my expensive request for central air. So..I must have been pretty awful to be around :( But what overweight person wouldnt be cranky when trying to function in a humid house at 86 degrees? It wouldnt have been so bad if there were just 1 window in the whole house that could accomodate a window air conditioner...but there isnt. Anyway....the weather hs been great and I have been really enjoying my walks/jogs. Its some time to listen to my music and have some "me" time which is hard to come by being a stay at home mom. And when I am done it is usualy about a half hour later and I am refreshed. I am also feling empowered and proud of myself! These feelings go a long way. They last throughout the day and usually motivate me to do it again on another day! So go me for sticking to my challenge. Lets hope the weight on the scale on Thursday adds to the motivation to keep the exercise up!

Today's reason for wanting to lose the weight:

I want to feel comfortable in my own skin. I want to wear the clothes I like and not feel fat. I want to be in front of people and not wonder if they think I am fat. I dont want to suck it in to make an outfit look acceptable. And better yet...I dont want acceptable outfits...I want outfits that I love and feel GOOD in! Wow...that reason of the day was deep.

Week 3- Gone! (Tricia)

Week 3 down. Another 2.2lbs gone. I was a little discouraged about such a low weight-loss this week and I told Jennifer that I feel like I could just do that on WW with out spending the money on Medifast. However, she did bring up a good point. I could never stay on WW because it gave me too much wiggle room and I could go off of it easier. This way, I know I have to eat 5 Medifast meals and one lean and green. My goal is 20lbs in the first 4 weeks and I am 3.8 lbs away. I have walked twice this week and hopefully Nay will keep pushing me to walk so I can meet my goal. I started to get a little board with my dinners too so i tried something a little different. I made tuna patties with some canned tuna, capers, and mayo. I fried it until it got warm and then placed the tuna in some lettuce hears to make a little roll up. I had some spinach with some ff cream cheese added to make a little side of creamed spinach and it was good. Tomorrow I am going to have the cauliflower pizza again because it was so yummy, but I think i need to spice up my dinners and create some new ones. We will see how that works out!

No more poor me (Jennifer)

I spent a lot of the day yesterday feeling bad about my 1.5 loss. I was feeling discouraged and wanting more than that for my hard work. But it was a tough week as I posted, although I did stick to plan. I hadnt exercised much. And today I have a different take. I am going to stop feeling sorry for myself and increase my exercise this week. I know I said this in an earlier post but the more I think of it, the more I realize that I need to push myself more if I really want to get the results I desire. And after my walk/jog yesterday I felt great...physically and mentally. At least for a bit. But the rest of the day I felt exhausted like maybe I had overdone it. I wonder if this is the norm? I also did some yard work yesterday and lots of raking. It doesnt seem like much but when the rake is like a foot taller than you it makes the work a little tougher :) Who knew they made rakes for giants? By the end of the night I was wiped. Although I did get a second wind after dinner for a short while.
My daughter was up last night for some reason and therefore I was too. I am a girl who needs her sleep! I wish I didnt, but I do. So I was a bit cranky this morning which prompted me to take a different approach and stop feeling bad for myself. Instead this "take charge and help yourself" mood took over. I am actually excited to challenge myself and see where it gets me on the scale next week. I will push myself and be excited for the next weigh day. Trish called me this morning with her results. I will let her share them with you but she said she also had been hoping for more of a loss. And I guess it is easy to feel this way when your first week leaves you with such a big weight loss! I gave her this same pep talk that I gave myself. I hope it worked. She made a comment that she could have lost that much on Weight Watchers. And I immediately told her that that is not the case for me. I have already thought of that and that is why I am here today. Before medifast I was doing WW and pretty much maintaining my weight. WW is not as rigid and gave me a lot of room for failure without even realizing. I wasnt motivated enough for that to work for me. A bite of this and that and not counting did me in. The WW plan is awesome and I will use it to maintain, no doubt. But to actually get this weight off I have decided that after several years of failure I just need more structure for myeslf in order to succeed. To each his own I guess. I am committed to make this work and it is a matter of trial and error of what makes it work best for my body.

Today's reason of the day to lose weight:
To wear a belt. Not that I want it to hold up my pants but I would just like to wear one and have it look good. I can picure the outfit now. A nice pair of jeans with a white shirt tucked in and an open sweater over it. And a pair of boots with heels that I hopefully could walk in when there is less weight to shuffle around. I guess that is two reasons...even better :)

Funny how things work (Teresa)

So I had some trouble controlling myself the other day and I was stressing about the outcome. I got on the scale today and I was actually down .5 lbs. Now I am thinking to myself well this is really mean...the scale is playing head games with me. The last thing I wanted to see after eating like crap was a loss of weight!!! So I had to talk it over to myself and I thought self....you are down.5 lbs because you were outside for 2 hours yesterday pulling a wagon. Imagine how much you would have been down if you did not eat all that crap!!! So anyway I am back on track thanks to the kind words of Jennifer and Tricia!! Thanks girls. You have been such a huge help! I love that we are all going through this together. Jen~ funny about the clothes shopping....I was visualizing the same thoughts in my own head just last night. I thought how great is it going to be to shop somewhere with the latest fashion rather than "in fashion" moo moo's! I cannot wait to look SEXY!

Down- 3 weeks done (Jennifer)

I am down 1.5 this week so that is pretty good I guess. It is a total loss of 14.5 for me so far. Would I have liked 2? Yes but all things considered I think 1.5 is good. I am thinking next week will be better. I am still feeling like I am taking in way more water than is coming out. I dont know if it just because it is that "time" for me or if something isnt right. I will run it by my health coach tonight. She usually calls on weigh day. Also, I am going to order some more food. So far my favorite things are the non fruit shakes, peanut butter, mint, and oatmeal raisin bars, and also the apple cinn oatmeal isnt bad. I am also a big fan of the puffs and the pudding that I can make into ice cream. But I am going to try maybe something new this time when I order. Not sure what yet. The brownie is good but not big enough for me to mentally allow it to be a meal. Tonight for my lean and green I am going to have a burger I think. Well 2 of the walmart kind and some broccoli. Or maybe cucumber instead. I am also going to make some time for me to take a walk today. And maybe if the Black Eyed Peas motivate me correctly I may even jog for a bit (a very small bit of course). Yes...this week I am going to experiment with exercise and see what 5 days of exercise gets me next week on the scale. So...this is my challenge to you as well. Find time for 15-30 minutes of exercise 5 days this week. Even if it is just a walk and see how this results next week on the scale... I think a challenge like this is something that we all need to experiment with. What do you say? Are you in?
Today's "reason of the day to lose weight"
*to be able to shop in a regular store and not have worry if the sizes go high enough for me to fit into...

I am committed (Jennifer)

Weigh in is tomorrow and I am nervous. Still feel all bloated but I decided not to stress over it. I feel good just knowing that I am on the program and helping myself. There isnt any guilt. And while there might be disappointment on the scale tomorrow I will hope for a better weigh in next time. But enough about that. Why stress over something I cant help, right?
The other day I had a dr appt and they were unfamiliar with Medifast. But then the dr chimed in and realized that he had heard of this program and they were doing something with it down at one of the hospitals. And I get nervous that when I tell someone about it that they will be a "hater" and tell me something negative. But so far Trish and I have seen 4 doctors between the two of us and they have all been all for it. So the dr was asking me all sorts of questions about it and said he and his wife may be interested!! And then when I told him who my dr was that put me on it he got even more interested because that dr is actually his friend he has known for years. He said that my other dr is a great dr and doesnt take anything lightly( I figured that out the first time I saw him, a very intelligent man) and if he is backing this plan then it must be something great. He then asked me a ton more questions and I felt so prepared answering them! I was like excited that I was part of this. It was at that point that I realized that I am totally committed. Although I should have realized that while I was watching my family eat McDonalds :) And regardless of what the scale shows tomorrow morning...I am committed and will continue on...one meal at a time.

Munchie Day (Tricia)

Today at work we had a munchies day. It was mostly cold foods : bagels, salad, cookies, soda, etc. It was on the other side of our department so it didn’t really bother me that much. That was, until I went looking for a spoon for my pudding. I walked over to the tables just trying to find something to eat my vanilla pudding with and had to rummage through all the goodness sitting on the table. I was trying to resist the old me and not just stuff something in my mouth. I had little alarms going off in my head screaming “red alert-please back up from the food.” I even had a moment of weakness and thought about picking up the one little cookie left on the platter. But I resisted and stamped off like a 6 year old grumbling “ Isn’t there a SPOON around here?”
I don’t think it would have been so bad if I hadn’t been craving a cheese burger for the last four days. I just keep thinking of a wonderful, juicy, cheesy, bacon and pickle covered patty on a roll with fries and bbq sauce on the side. I have been whining about it for days. My co-workers are ready to kill me. They look at me in that way that says “Shut it and drink your shake!” I just can’t help it. I have been feeling very unsatisfied. Not even my yummy dinners work. I just am looking for someone to tell me its ok for me to cheat and eat it. That’s all I really want, the confirmation from someone, anyone, to say that it won’t be a big deal to eat one, just do it and go back on your diet tomorrow. Sadly, no one has given in to my constant whining. And that’s why I think my friends are great (don’t let me give in, people).
I lived up to my thought yesterday and went for a walk outside with Nay after work today. It was great. I could only do one lap around the parking lot, but its one lap farther than I made yesterday.
My reason for weight loss today?
I can break my constant thought about food.

Here I am! TERESA

Well I am back! Sorry it took so long! Thanks for the shot out Tricia! Once I read your comment on FB I new it had been way too long. So I am still counting points and I am down 6 lbs in 3 weeks. I am trying to stay positive and be proud but lately eating healthy seems like a chore. Yesterday was really tough for me. Something triggered an eating frenzie in me. I do not know if it was something I ate or all the thoughts going through my head about my life. I am thinking that it was the stress the thoughts brought to me. I am def a stress eater. Food is my comfort. I have always had this problem a little bit, but is has been much worse the last few years. I think that many of the changes in my life have been difficult for me. I have lost a lot of close relationships( more like the relationships have changed in one way or another) and I think that sadly they have been replaced with food. I have been staying active. Everyday I take my son out for a wagon ride. It is great exercise because not only and I walking but I am pulling 30+ lbs behind me! I am going to start going to the gym again because I need to set time aside for myself. I also need to be around other people who are doing healthy things. It is motivating to me. I am hoping that this blog will get me back on track or that a few people will yell at me and tell me to keep going!!! I want this time to be different. Once I get to where I want to be I want to stay there. I have traveled to the magical place of good health and beauty many times but I have never cared enough to stay there. This time I care. I do not know what my life will bring or where I will be 2 years from now, but I know that I want to be writing a blog about how great life is as a healthy, beautiful women.
~kisses!

My DVR

I just want to say that I heart my DVR. How did we ever survive life having to watch live TV? How can we get through a show having to watch commercials instead of fast forwarding them? How?! With that being said, my husband and I enjoy TV. Me especially. In the past I could not wait to get home just to sit on the couch and watch mindless shows. But, I realized tonight that in the past week and a half, I haven't really watched much TV. I have been doing other things like doing chores or preparing for the next day etc. The normal things that I usually put off until the weekend, or until next week, or even next month, I have been doing. I mean, its not because I really WANT to do them. Who really says "Yay, lets do the laundry!" or 'Woohoo, I am going to do the dishes!" But I have found myself not putting things off and just doing them. I did watch a Biggest Loser tonight, but I just had it on while I was working on other things. But other than that, the TV has been on in the evenings on the music channels while I dance away with my mop. Its a pretty site I am sure. But its not that I am not watching TV, I just don't want to be. I don't want to be on my couch sitting there. I want to be up moving around!
On my way home today I was enjoying the great weather and actually thought to myself that I should take a walk at lunch tomorrow. A walk! That is something that this fluffy girl has not ever suggested to herself. Heck, I get mad if my husband parks too far away at the restaurant because I have to walk farther to the door! I am pretty impressed with myself for even thinking of that little change in my day. Now, some other people who are reading this might think that I am lazy (true) and feel sad for me that a walk might seem like a big deal (true again) but I don't care. It is the life of a fat girl. And I am going to get out there and do it!
So, what is today's reason for losing the weight?
To be able to enjoy a nice spring afternoon walk.

Ugh... (Jennifer)

Normally I would be excited about my weigh in on Thursday morning. And this week has gone by pretty fast. But thanks to mother nature and the fact that I am a woman I am dreading it this week. I feel huge, bloated, and just uncomfortable. I dont want to work out in the slightest. I have stayed on plan 100% but I honestly feel that if I were to get on the scale this very moment it would yell at me and tell me to get off and come back on a different day. haha. So I have this battle going on inside my head. If I still feel this way come Thursday morning (is it even possible to get rid of the bloat by then?) do I still suck it up and get on the scale or wait until I am back to feeling normal again? Do I accept whatever number comes on there even if it is a gain and hope for better next week? Because at this second I feel like it will definately be a gain. I feel huge. I am taking in water and more water and my body is definately just holding onto it. But weigh in is a day and a half away so I am just hoping for the best :)

McDonald's (Jennifer)

Today I was brave and my husband and I took the girls out...to McDonalds. For those of you who know me I love McDonalds. LOVE MCDONALDS. And my "weight games" always led me there. When I would fall off the weight wagon I would go there. When I was just being defiant, I went there. When I felt hungry or just wanted something yummy, I went to McDonalds. And right before I would start one of my many diets, I went to McDonalds. And I have the fatty liver to represent my love of McDonalds. And when Trish called me tonight and I told her I was on the way to Mcdonalds she said " NO! NOT MCDONALDS!!!" You get the point. So yes...it was brave of me to venture there. It was kind of a test for me I guess. But I knew I would succeed. I knew I wasnt going to have enough time for my lean and green before we left the house so I decided to have a mint crunch bar. This used to be my favorite until I discovered the peanut butter and the oatmeal raisin bars. These bars make me so excited to eat them and give me a sense of guilt because they taste so good. Anyway...I had a mint bar and off we went. We were sitting at McDonalds and everyone was eating...the kids eating very slowly as usual and my husband fast enough that I am not sure he breathes between bites. But I hung in there! I had a sense of accomplishment. Did I want a bite of their food? Yes. And the fries looked and smelled great. But I didnt do it. I drank my diet coke and then got another. The bubbles filled me up and by the time we left there I felt so accomplished. But I found myself wondering...how can I be for certain there isnt any "accidental" real sugar/carbs in this soda? Can those machines be that precise? I fear this because the main reason Medifast works is by keeping you in fat burning mode. Just a few carbs over the allowed, or one accidental meal can take you out of that mode and it would take days of proper eating to get you back in. It would be like starting over. And this very concept is what makes this program work for me. I dont want to undo any of my hard work and have to start over!!! I want to make the best out of every day of effort.
So...I came home and made a cauliflower (crust) pizza again. It was excellent and it took me half the time as it did the other night. I think I will keep it to once or twice a week but I shouldnt feel guilty about it because the cheese is on the meatless options on the Medifast site. But yet it tastes so good that I feel like I am cheating!! I went out to eat yesterday with Karen and I couldnt help but feel a little out of control again. I was thinking...I got grilled chicken breast over salad greens with light ranch on the side. I used minimal dressing as I dunked the fork before I grabbed my food. The dressing tasted so good...too good. So again I asked myself...how can I be sure this is light dressing? I did ask her but who knows what actually came, right? And who knows what yummy stuff is on the grilled chicken. And I didnt have a scale to see how much meat there was but I am sure it was less than 6 oz. I also had no idea how much green was on my plate. 2 cups? 3? 4? (Sorry Karen for you having to listen to all my thoughts outloud). And the salad greens had more than just green leaf lettuce. I have no idea what some of those green and red stemmy things were(yet I ate them :). So I was hoping they were on the approved veggie list. I think the best answer may be to ask questions next time but I just hate to be one of "those people". Thats all I need is the cook to come out with some bag of greens pointing out what each different green thing is. But I guess I will find out how these things affected me on weigh day. I experimented with new things this week and it made the week easier for me! I feel like a normal eating person...
And for those of you wanting to know how Zumba went....it was CANCELED. I am still devastated!

And my reason for the day that I want to lose the weight....
*smaller clothes = less laundry

A weekend of company (Jennifer)

This weekend my husband was off from work and we had out of town company just about all weekend. This is when it usually gets tough for me. Thats when I usually start feeling like I want what they are having. But it wasnt too bad this weekend. It is Sunday night and I am sitting here realizing that I made it through the weekend successfully. But I owe so many thanks to Lyn and her "Escape from Obesity" blog. She posted not only a recipe but a picture of what her cauliflower pizza looked like. Let me tell you...she is my hero(If you read this Lyn THANK YOU!!!!). If I had ever seen the words "cauliflower pizza" without the picture I probably wouldnt even give it a second look. Or I would think it was pizza with cauliflower on top. Well...no. This food could be one of the best things I have ever eaten. I would (and definately will when the day comes) eat this even when I was not on a diet. It is pretty much a crust made up of shredded cauliflower, egg beaters and cheese. It is baked and gets firm and then you put the toppings you would like on and broil briefly. It looks and tastes just like pizza. And I could eat the whole thing for what I calculated to be less than 300 calories since I used only about 240 calories worth of cheese. This is way lower than what I would eat for two hamburgers! So when everyone else was having homemade pizzas I had mine! My friend who was here couldnt beleive what I was doing and asked me if I would make her one. She is a health conscious person without a weight issue. She loved this and ate the whole thing! I kid you not when I tell you this is great. I dont even like cauliflower very much. And I am happy to tell you this has not even the remote taste of cauliflower :) So I called up Trish when I saw this online and she went right to the store and made herself one too. In my opinion that is trust because she hadnt seen the picture!! For those of you who dont know...Trish and I live a few hours apart but our support on here and by phone has been great. It has brought us so much closer.
Anyway...then last night round 2 of company came...my inlaws. And my mother in law brought so many yummy things. She always does and I never turn them down. And it must be pretty obvious because at one point she said "wow...you are being really good". It makes me wonder what kind of ravenous animal I must look like when I eat??? I didnt tell her I was doing Medifast until that moment. And while there were lots of things I wanted including the stop at A&W (the root beer/hot dog place) I remained composed and on track. I was so proud of myself. Self pride is a feeling I havent felt in a while and I am enjoying it.
Yesterday I read on Lyn's blog about food being a source of pleasure. I have learned a lot of things about myself and figured so many things out in the last few months. this is one of them. Food=comfort and immediate(but short term) happiness. And reading her post about this topic was like she had typed the words right out of my thoughts. I was about in tears reading it put down into words. I have turned to food as a comfort when things got tough. And things did get tough and seemed to stay that way for a while. But now I am trying to do little things for myself...like joining Zumba. I was so hesitant to join since I didnt want to be "the fat girl" and "the new girl". But it was the best thing I could have done for myself for many reasons. Its tomorrow night and I cant wait (even with the "jiggle").
And on that note I will end this novel...hope everyone had a great weekend.

a mini goal? Day 15 (Tricia)

Today was a busy day for me. I got up early, went to the dr, picked up my car from the shop, grocery shopped, cleaned the house, and made dinner. Whew! I usually would be exhausted at this point but I am not that tired. I guess a little weight off really makes a difference!

I was talking today with my doctor about the Medifast plan and she asked me what my weight goal was. I actually had to pause for a moment because I hadn't decided that yet. She then asked me what my lowest weight was as an adult. Hmm....170 I think...and that was still way over what I should be but It was the lowest in my adult life, in college. Here I actually started to tell you about my child hood and perhaps the many different reasons why I am over weight today, but I had to delete it because I don't think I am ready to discuss that yet. So lets take it from college. I really didn't gain that much weight in College until, umm.. I would say my junior year, and that was still only about 10 lbs. Maybe perhaps because school was getting harder or I was getting less active. I think that this is around the time I began having symptoms of sleep apnea, but I didn't really recognize the signs, even though I was always exhausted even thought I would get a pretty decent night's sleep. I did try WW with Jennifer around that time, as well as a few diets. We did lose some weight, but the dieting never lasted that long. HAHA, we even tried one that restricted your carb intake for the day, but you could eat whatever you wanted for 1 hour a day..Lets just say we we were trying to stuff a whole roll of cookies in our mouth before the buzzer.
Then came our senior year. Mid year, Jennifer and I suffered a great loss when our grandfather died. It really was devastating to us both. Senior year, second semester became four moths of juggling my school work, my boyfriend (my husband), and driving back and forth from school to home twice a week. I came home for two reasons: to take my Nanny to bingo and stay with her on Wednesday nights, and to see Nate and my friends on the weekend. Our Nanny had a very difficult time dealing with the death of her husband, whom she had been married to for over 50 years. I think that I felt I had to be strong for her and myself and that was really the moment when I learned how to push my feelings deep inside of me. So, what did I do to push them further down? Right. EAT. I gained weight and gained weight. I remember that by the following year, I was up almost 50 lbs. Yeah. I said it. 50.
And then once I started my bad habits of course, my weight began to continually rise. Now, I am not saying that this is the only reason for my weight.( I do realize that there are other factors involved, which may be saved for another blog).
So, what was the point of a slow walk down memory lane with me? ( I say slow walk because if you ask my friends, and my cousin, I am the slowest person ever, and there is no jogging-Yet) Well, after the doctor asked me what my weight goal was, I began thinking. All day today I have been trying to think about when I took dieting seriously. I mean a stab at WW here or there, but I would start and not last very long on it. And then I realized that I never have really put my heart into it. I have never really given it a chance. I have never lost more than about 15 lbs on any diet. This is the first time I am making a serious commitment to myself to lose the weight. And because of that, I have decided not to look at the big picture (because that is a BIG picture) but to start with a reasonable goal from where I am at now. My mini goal is to lose 20 lbs. To prove to myself that I can do this. To keep me motivated to do something I have never achieved before. To do it for me.

Week 2 Over! (Tricia)

Well, hello everyone!
I am happy to report that I am down another 3.5 lbs this week! YAY! That brings me to a total of 13.5 lbs in two weeks and I couldn't be happier! I have noticed that my jeans are fitting much better and even my shirts have a little more room in them. I noticed that I am having trouble buttoning my coat when I put it on because I am now over estimating where the buttons are and have to look down to see that I went past it by about an inch. It makes me smile every time I put on my coat. Darn, I should try putting it on every hour!
I have decided next week that I am going to start to exercising, but taking it slow with about 15 min a day and I won't forget to take a bar with me just in case! I can't believe how much support I am getting from my friends at work, they have been terrific and are always conscious of my situation and are there to cheer me on. Thanks to all of you for believing in me even when sometimes I don't. I sound like I am accepting an award "thank you to all of the little people out there who have made this possible". But really, you aren't little people, you are the reason I know I can get through another day.

And I would just like to say welcome to our new followers. I hope you find our blog relatable and I hope you can share some of your experiences too!

Being more active (Jennifer)

So I have taken advantage of this beautiful weather the last few days. The fact that its been around 50 degrees and the snow is melting is amazing in itself in Syracuse, but the fact that its not snowing is even more amazing! Usually we get snow through April. So before the next snow storm or lake effect which I am sure is inevitable I decided to let my Spring fever take over. I have been BBQing a lot. There is nothing better than the smell of burgers on the grill and some sunshine on the deck. Well...actually...leaves on the trees would be awesome... but now I am just daydreaming....
I went for a walk the other morning with Sugar. It was great! It was sunny and even though a bit chipper I loved it. I felt like I had so much energy and even jogged for a bit. Me and the black eyed peas were rocking out. I only know one song by them but it gets me moving. But...Sugar had a different opinion about jogging. Picture it...West Monroe, 2010(boy do I miss the Goldern Girls) ... the chubby girl running down the road dragging her 60 lb dog behind her. She did not want to keep up. I could just read her mind... she was definately saying "Are you serious????" I dont think she got much exercise before we rescued her from South Carolina. So we stopped jogging and she went right to bed when she got inside. Me...I was shockingly pumped. This new energy is addictive. I am totally loving it. I took the girls for a wagon ride two days in a row and they just loved it. And towing 55 extra pounds behind me felt great! I actually looked forward to it and when my legs hurt going up the hills I got a sense of pride instead of "please make this stop". And the other night after dinner we packed the girls up and took Sugar for a quick walk before it got dark. Which is great until the neighborhood dogs want a piece of my Sugar :( That stresses me because their dogs arent on leashes. One came running up to Sugar barking the other day and apparently Sugar felt he got too close to her and she sure did let them know. So now I am sure we are "the new people on the street with the mean dog". But I dont think she is mean especially when the kids are riding her around the house....she takes a lot of friendly abuse from the girls :)
Anyway...my point is that I like having energy and I like the idea of helping myself! It is great. The only thing I do question is this(so if any of you know please chime in)...You are allowed to exercise no more than 45 minutes of strenuous activity a day. My health coach told me not to burn more calories than I am taking in. But since I am taking in only around 1000 calories a day dont I burn more than that a day by just existing?? Wont that put me into starvation mode and make it even worse when exercising? Or is the fact that we are taking in so many vitamins and protein the key to making sure that doesnt happen? Any thoughts would be appreciated.
Congrats to Trish on her weight loss this week. I will let her share that info with you all :) Happy Friday to you all!

Week 2 Results (Jennifer)

The results are in. 3 lbs down this week! At first the scale said 3.5, then 3, then 4 so I decided to go with the least amount. The scale is usually within a pound no matter how many times I get on. So...I am pretty happy with 3 lbs. I have been a little more active this week but knew that the weight loss cant be huge every single week. Plus I took advantage of the condiment options and snacks. And 3 lbs of fat gone is a great accomplishment to me! The lowest weight I have been in well over a decade is a mere 7 lbs away. That is my first mini goal. Trish...do you have a mini goal??? So to me...once I get there is when the real excitement begins. Thats when I will venture into territories I haven been since college. My weight didnt really become a problem until then. My mom ALWAYS had a well balanced meal on the table every night. Like most girls I thought I was fat but looking back the pics I sure was not....It wasnt until I went to college and got some freedom that things went downhill. But even then I only put on the freshman 15 or so. But once I started dating my husband the "happy fat" poured on. And that is over 11 years ago now. He is a big guy(not fat, just big) and boy can he eat. And I began to eat just like him...for the last 11 years. And it got worse after the girls were born(2 babies in 15 months!!!). My whole body formation changed after the 2 c-sections. It is easy to let yourself go when you have so many duties as mom and your priority is to take care of the kids. My husband kept telling me "give yourself a break...you just had two babies in 15 months). And when my youngest, Emma, was sick there really was no time or interest to help myself. My focus was not on me. Her illness(es) lasted for over a year. But hindsight is 20/20 and I now realize that exercise and taking control of myself was probably the best thing I could have done for myself at that time. But instead I chose the instant gratification of food to make a hard time feel a little better with each yummy bite I took. But it only felt better until I was full and then I felt guilty. It was a whole cycle that went round and round every day. And that was the hardest time of my life with everything that was going on. And much like Trish...one day something clicked for me. What have I done to myself? It wasnt just my weight. My weight affected so many other parts of my life. My attitude, my stress level, my self esteem, my activity level(I was so exhausted all of the time), etc. I realized it was time to take care of me. And I am capable of doing so while taking care of our girls! And having a great support system is so wonderful so I encourage all of you who read this to jump in and make the comments to both me and Trish... even if you dont know one of us (thanks Bonnie :). Because it is these things that help us. That is exactly why we created this blog. So thanks to all of you for following.
Wow...this was supposed to be a short results post and really turned into a therapy session!!! haha. Sorry about that. But just like on the biggest loser(haha) I have realized that until you realize what it is that made you gain weight or live an unhealthy lifestyle it is impossible to get the weight off and keep it off. And that is our goal...

AHHHH (Tricia)

I am sitting here enjoying my first vanilla shake. I am so happy that my new food came in and I was stalking the UPS tracking site all day. After such a crazy and stressfull day it makes me happy that I can enjoy a shake and not feel like I am missing out on any other foods. Just enjoying the sipping, blogging, and moments before bed. Two days before weigh-in for me and I am still optomistic it will go well. I can't wait to here Jennifer's results first thing in the morning and I hope Teresa blogs about her third week too. We are doing great ladies, keep it up!!

Day 13- Inspired (Jennifer)

Wow Trish...your last post was very inspirational. It is deep and very well thought out. And i have known you as long as I have known me and I do believe that you are now a diffrent person. I see something so different in you...a glow. And I know you see it too. I know i keep saying that but we have know each other all our lives and this new you is great. I DO agree with you that you were feeling out of control of your life and that alone will make you cranky. It works the same way for me (and maybe most "fluffy" people?). And what makes a cranky "fluffy" girl feel better? FOOD...yummy food. For that few minutes it feels good. At least that is how it worked for me. When things around us get tough it is easy to make ourselves feel better for that moment. But what you are doing now is something you have never done for yourself. You are working very hard(and it is definately hard) to make yourself feel better for your future and every day forward from this second on. And I am so proud of you. You have taken back control over your life and you are definately finding it LIBERATING. And should the day come when you consider a "cheat" ask yourself if this awesome feeling you are having of being back in control of you is worth giving up for one stinking yummy meal. And I bet you will say no. I have learned that taking this journey one meal at a time is the answer. If I look into the future and feel bad for myself about when I can have pizza again it feels much more overwhelming than choosing what I will eat for the next meal. We have the tools to succeed. We should consider it a gift and get the most out of it. Everything happens for a reason and although I had to end up at a cardiologist in order to stumble upon this plan...I wouldnt take any of it back if it is the change that we needed to make us better(in so many ways) people for the rest of our lives.
That being said...tomorrow is my weigh in and like last week I am both nervous and excited. I talked to my health coach who said everyone is different but 2-4 lbs would be normal. And that is fine with me. But what if it is less? I need to prepare for that too. I have a better grip on how much 6 oz of meat is and I was jipping myself before. So this week I am definately eating more and also taking advantage of the condiment options as well as the snacks. So for me I dont know what to expect. But this is all a learning lesson. Stay tuned for the results!

Food for Thought- Day 12 (Tricia)

Three days until weigh-in and I couldn't be more excited. I cant wait to see what results will come this week, even though I am very aware that it will not be as big of a loss as last week. I am hanging in there and I am not even tempted to eat something that is not on my diet. With that said, I really could go for a Blue Burger from Wendy's..mmm...Wendy's. And that is mostly thanks to the delicious commercials they show on TV. I guess I never realized how many commercials there are on TV for food. That's probably because if I wanted it, I got it..and ate it all! But now that I am not, I have become very aware of every food add there is and the catchy jingles that get stuck in my head. And I know at least once this week you caught yourselves singing "give me that fillet o'fish, give me that fish"! Don't lie. you did...or I just made you sing it in your head. Either way, way to go McDonald's. So, a little food for thought (yeah, I totally said it). I know we all have a responsibility to ourselves to keep us healthy. But how hard is it to resist eating the terrible foods when it is constantly in our faces? Our society as a culture has looked down upon us fluffy people and think of us as grotesque in a way. As a child, we are teased. And as we grow up, the teasing stops, but the staring doesn't. That is, until you try to make eye contact with someone and then they just look away. We are the proverbial elephant in the room. Even fat people judge other fat people for being fat.
So what makes us fluffy people different from the skinny person sitting next to us? Genetics? Will power? Self esteem? As I sit back in my chair and ponder the response to my own question, my real answer is: I have no idea why I am the way I am. I certainly do not like myself this way. I don't wake up in the morning and think how I can make myself fatter over the course of the day. I don't get excited when i squeeze into jeans that used to fit me 6 months ago. Perhaps for me the answer may be as simple as my desire for control. I cant control whats happening around me, but I can sure control what I put in my mouth, even if it is the ice cream and not the salad. I can control how much I eat, even if it is two double cheese burgers at the drive through, and you (the world) cant. But really, isn't it an antithesis? I am in control of my food, but out of control with my eating. And the answer to my dilemma, ironically, is more control. But this time, its control over myself. Knowing that I do control what I eat, but I am choosing to eat something healthy. Control over how much I eat to make sure I don't lick Nate's plate clean when he is done.
So, I challenge YOU, my over weight friends out there to have a conversation with yourself and ask: What is the difference between you and the skinny girl next to you? I bet you surprise yourself with the answer.

Day 11- Zumba (Jennifer)

So today I decided to give Zumba a try again. And after my last experience I was pretty nervous. So I tried to prepare myself better. I ate a Maintenance bar before I went(they are a little bigger and have a few more carbs to them. You are allowed 1 per day) and I also ate half of the lean part of my meal. And it seemed to help immensely. I made it all the way through with no lightheadness or upset stomach! I was so excited. I got the hang of the moves a little better this week. Dont get me wrong...it still wasnt pretty. hehe. At one point the teacher came over and told me to keep my legs still and only move my upper body for one of the (dirty) dance moves. And since I am the biggest girl there she clearly didnt understand that no matter how still my bottom half is that I am a fat girl and its gonna "jiggle". Period. And Trish...thank you for your uncontrolable bout of hysterics when I told you this. But overall I was pretty proud of myself. I feel like I get a good workout doing it. I am not so out of breath that I cant function but my face gets all red so I know I am "doing a body good".
And I would like to say thanks to Trish for recognizing that I had a tough weekend and stepping up to the plate to be a great support system. I truly needed that because I was doubting if I could do this. Once we talked it set my priorities straight. I also got my food today and that motivated me all over again. VARIETY IS KEY. Teresa...you have been a huge supporter checking on me daily too. Hope to hear more from you on here soon????? Girls....I think in a future post we should make a list of reason why we want to lose the weight...to keep up focused. Maybe even post one at the end of each post?
Okay...I'll start:
*I dont want the parts to "jiggle" unless I ask them to :)

The results (Tricia)

Well hello everyone!
It has been a busy few days, but I did want to tell you about my weigh-in on Friday. I lost 10lbs! I couldn't be happier about the results so far. I feel so much better, my clothes are fitting looser, and I have completely cut caffeine out of my diet. Its amazing what just 10lbs will do for you. I am looking forward to the next weigh-in already, even though I know it will not be such a drastic loss.
I also had a mini success on Friday night. I went to dinner with my friend and had no problem at all ordering my lean and green meal and Applebee's (place add here) was more than happy to accommodate my meal choices. I was still a little jealous of my friend's meal, but I didn't give in and I was completely satisfied with my grilled chicken and steamed broccoli.
So, I hope everyone is doing well out there and you are getting closer to your weight-loss goals. Please keep commenting on our blogs to give any suggestions or just moral support, we can all use some positive thoughts.
Thanks, and good night.
I will be here all week (LOL)

Day 10 (Jennifer)

Trish....where are your results?!?!??! I know them but maybe others dont! Post with pride girl!!! So proud of you :)
So my parents are out this weekend and it has been a little challenging. The more people the more temptations apparently. My mom cooked a big breafast, the girls made cookies and all sorts of yummies with Nana. But my parents are great and very supportive so that is extremely helpful. My mom watched me "prepare" all my meals since she has gotten here. She said it doesnt seem like I am eating much but she is proud that I seem to have the control.
Today I wanted pizza though. No one around me was eating pizza but I just wanted it for some reason. I think the only thing that gets me through this is getting to eat every 2-3 hours. That and my lean and green meal. I know its never far until my next "meal" and that is helpful. Also...having variety to choose from is nice. I am expecting my next order on Monday and I will be a stalker at the front window waiting for the UPS man to drop the package off! I already have visions of eating one of the new brownies with cream cheese on it since that is allowed too. Yummmm. Since my parents are here I made a chicken. I stuffed it with stuffing as usual and made the potatoes but still only ate the chicken and a salad. I love that satisfied feeling after my lean and green meal. 6 oz of chicken is quite a bit of meat as is 2 whole hamburgers. There is no bread or anything so it fills me like 1 cheeseburger on a bun would(and chips and cookies and pasta...you get the point). My supply is dwindling and tomorrow I will have to be picky with what I eat. I refuse to eat my chicken soup so that shorts me 5 meals for the week. Thats a whole day! I just cant do the soup. But I will make it and look forward to getting some new stuff Monday.

The results..drums please... (Jennifer)

So I was hesitant to weigh in this morning because I felt like maybe my rings were tight and I had some pickles yesterday and thought maybe I was retaining water. But I got over myself and got on the scale. I got on like 6 times because I didnt believe what it said. 10 pounds lost! In one week!!! I am sure most of it is water weight because you arent allowed many things that have salt(except the pickles of course) so once you get rid of that water weight in the first few days it must stay gone! I am so surprised and happy with the results. It gave me a whole "bring it on" attitude! Whoopie! I know results wont be like this every week but it was a great way to start! Good luck tomorrow Trish!!! Call me as soon as you weight(but after you put your clothes back on...hahaa).

Night before weigh-in- Day 7 (Tricia)

This week has felt like an eternity. It is the night before weigh in and I am so excited! Jennifer weighed in this morning and I am waiting for her to post her terrific news!
I placed my next order for food and I can’t wait for it to come. More shakes, bars, and pudding.
Its hard to believe last Thursday I was eating my last meal at Cheesecake. Mmm…

Ode to Iffer-Day 6 (Tricia)

I had a similar experience today as Jennifer. All I wanted was a pizza. Oh, and I don't mean that I wanted a slice of pizza, I wanted the whole pizza. A lovely cheese pizza just for me. One that was piping hot so the cheese just slid right off. One with a thin crust on the bottom and thick around the edges. And for desert? A chocolate cake. Mmmm…. Yes, this is what I truly wanted for lunch. Of course, I would never be able to eat that much, but the thought of it in front of me was just too much to handle. The beef stew I did have for lunch was just NOT the same! But, I dealt with it and tried to pretend my chocolate mint bar I had in the afternoon was a piece of cake. Today was really the first day that I looked at the big picture and really realized how long it will be until I will be able to eat a slice of pizza or that piece of cake, and it made me doubt that I could do this, just for a moment. I mean, I haven’t even made it through week one yet and I have oh, so many more to go. But, I changed my thoughts to Jennifer. Jennifer has been with me all week dealing with the same struggles. This week, she has been my number one supporter and has been pushing me and filling me with positive thoughts. I cannot thank you enough, Iffer. Her positive reinforcement has made me truly excited about this new experience and I am looking forward to being a healthy weight for my height (Yes, Jennifer, I really am 5’2”). After some thought tonight I realized that I have been in a better mood this week. I fell different, less negative. I have a sense of pride every time I have a medifast meal and I walk right by the cafeteria. I feel more light-hearted and can laugh more easily. Perhaps this diet has changed me more than just my weight. Maybe this was the change I have been looking for for a while. And, because I have realized this thanks to Jennifer, I have prepared a little ditty just for her.
(ahem)
Ode to Iffer
O’ Iffer how you have helped me
See that I am not just a fatty .
You make me laugh every day
While we both shrink away.
Soon our pants will be too big
And we will dance a happy jig.
Off shopping we will go
To buy some smaller clothes
And to get our hair did.
Thank you
(snaps please)

Weigh day tomorrow (Jennifer)

So today is day seven and I get to weigh myself tomorrow. There are no rules on how often you can weigh yourself but I decided once a week is best for me. It will keep my motivation stronger I hope. Today I survived a pizza party that was happening all around me. Like 5 people offered me pizza. I politely said no and had my crunch bar and water I brought. I tried to be prepared and left without eating pizza! For those of you who know me...pizza is up there on my favorite things to eat list(although there are lots of things on that list...). This was my newest mini success. Medifast is so structured and rigid and it is so different for me to think this way! The old me would have eaten a piece or two without a thought and would have found a way to get another(and try not to look like a pig) if it was really good :( I will be sure to post tomorrow! Wish me luck :)

Don’t feed the animals- Day 4/5 (Tricia)

I apologize for not blogging yesterday, I have been in quite the crabby mood (for confirmation, please see my husband…he is huddled in the corner). After a VERY long two days, I was able to find some comic relief (thank you, Jennifer). I came into work this morning and found four (yes, I said 4) boxes of girl scout cookies on my desk, which was followed by a return to sender request so I wouldn’t be temped to eat them all. After I returned them to my friend for distribution, I became aware that EVERYONE had girl scout cookies and one of the ladies at work also made chocolate chip cookies. All day I had a parade at my desk asking me if I wanted a cookie. Please, like they think I would have just taken one. HA! To my surprise, I kindly declined the offer and kept my mind in my work and my Medifast food. I gave myself a pat on the back for that! During one of my calls to Jennifer today I explained this to her and she suggested that I put a sign on my desk nicely saying that I would not care for their food. Which, made me think about what this sign might really say: Please don’t feed the animals. And, on my ride home, I continued to think about this sign and paired with my crankiness , I got the funniest image in my head. Picture it, Albany 2010. Tricia is sitting in her cubical surrounded by fencing. A friendly co-worker approaches the fence, timid at first, with a roll of thin mints in her hand. She sees the note on the cage, but decides that she will offer me the treat anyway. She quietly whispers to me with out making eye contact: Tricia…want a cookie? And I turn around in my chair..eyes wide open and growl. The co-worker quickly removes her hand and the cookie from the slot in the fence and runs for her life. HEHE, she is lucky she didn’t lose a finger.
The second challenge of the day was dinner. I had planned to have dinner with my dad and Nanny tonight and I was coming prepared. I had my lean and green meal all ready…6oz chicken, 1 cup spinach, 1 cup of broccoli. I was so proud of myself and kept telling myself that I could do this! I was about to leave work and I noticed the top to my food was a little loose so I attempted to secure it. However, while doing this it slipped from my hands and my whole dinner landed on the floor. It wasn’t like it just tipped over and maybe I could salvage the bottom portion ( I know ew..but you have thought about it before, don’t lie) but it was spread out over about three feet of high traffic carpet. My friend Nicole was standing across from me when it happened. She looked at my dinner all over the floor and then back at me and just started laughing. Not in a mean way, just in the way that meant to say…That totally sucks! So after pouting for a few minutes and scraping my yummy dinner off of the floor (Sorry cleaning guys) I went off to Nanny’s. When I got there, Nanny and Dad were enjoying a very tasty smelling dinner and I ate a peanut butter crunch bar. I have to say that it did go pretty well, however Nanny did remove the fresh brownies from my view. Tricia: 2 Food: 0.
I would like to follow this up by giving props to my cousin for suggesting that I stop at the grocery store to pick up a rotisserie chicken on my way home. What a great suggestion!
Also, I want to thank Teresa for blogging and I am so happy that you are doing so well!

Day 6- This week is forever...

It seems like this week has taken forever. I started on Thursday and have been posting since. And I just cant wait to get on the scale! I am only going to weigh once a week. So Thursday morning is my day. But for some reason it feels like I have been on this plan for weeks! It hasnt been as challenging as I had expected and I am just hoping to see results! I have missed eating out here or there but I feel good knowing what I am putting on the table for my family to eat. And I have learned a few things along the way. I am appreciative of what I am eating. Before this I would not have been appreciative of broccoli on my plate...or two tablespoons of salad dressing. I also learned that my burger was 4 oz before I cooked it and 2 oz after. These are things I never would have learned before. Tonight I had broccoli and 6 oz of Rotisseri chicken. I also had a small side of salad dressing. It felt like Thanksgiving! It was seasoned perfectly and 6 oz seemed like so much meat. Yummy :)

Week2 (Teresa)

Well nothing says you need to lose weight like a little sleigh riding with your kid!! Pulling Shea up the hill on a sled in 2 feet of snow was probably the most exercise I have had in a while and boy it was eye opening. I was exhausted!!!! So any second thoughts I have had or the happy fat feeling I once had...gone.... all gone! Eating healthy is becoming a habit and an enjoyable one at that. I was just reminded tonight how much I love frozen grapes when I bit into one after dinner tonight....what a great snack, sweet, and cold! YUMMY!!!!! Tricia and Jen...hope things are well with you both!!!